Nether Worry
by CabooseHeart
Summary: Minecraft AU. In which the Reds and Blues come across a lonely Creative Mode dweller, Sarge makes about ten times more Iron Golems than are strictly necessary, and where Tucker learns that Wash is indeed not a replacement for Church and that may or may not be a bad thing after all.
1. Chapter 1

**Nether Worry**

**Part 1**

**AU: Minecraft/Red Vs. Blue**

**Pairing: Agent Washington/Tucker, Caboose/Church, Grif/Simmons**

**Description: Minecraft AU. In which the Reds and Blues come across a lonely Creative Mode dweller, Sarge makes about ten times more Iron Golems than are strictly necessary, and where Tucker learns that Wash is indeed not a replacement for Church and that may or may not be a bad thing after all.**

**A/N: This has already been posted on AO3 and on Tumblr, so I thought it best I post it on my RvB/NSFW account on FFN. This, however, has no slash (Though hints at it).**

* * *

><p>"You're leaving us?"<p>

Church glanced up at Tucker after retrieving his bow and arrow from the chest, giving the younger miner a once over; Tucker was dressed in loosely fitting teal/aqua/whatever the fuck dyed leather armor that was once worn by a much older miner, who had lost his last life years ago. Beside Tucker was Caboose, who wore blue dyed leather armor, tears trailing down his babyish face at a steady pace. The cobalt leader sighed, looking away again to focus on grabbing more equipment from his chest.

"Only for a little while." Church reminded Tucker, grabbing some bread while he was at it. "Tex is fucking determined to get that damn egg; I'm not letting her go alone."

"Dude, you only have, like, four or five lives left." Tucker reminded Church, tapping his foot as he swung his enchanted diamond sword loosely by his side. "Can't you stay put? We just got over Flowers, and we're almost done putting up torches around the base."

Church shook his head, sighing. "I've made up my mind, Tucker. I gotta go."

"Please don't." Caboose whispered, sniffling as he rubbed at his eyes, intent on staring at his boots instead of at his leader. "I do not want you to die."

"Hey," Church started, walking right up to Caboose; such moments of affection were rare enough as it was, reminding then of the inevitable, otherwise Church wouldn't dare act like that in front of Tucker. "I'll be back before you know it, buddy. I'll even bring you back a wolf, how 'bout that?"

"Will he have a blue collar?" Caboose asked, finally clearing his face of the tears, leaving his face red; his shaggy black hair stuck to his forehead with sweat, reminding Church of the nightmares Caboose had experienced the night before upon learning that Church would be leaving the next morning.

Church shrugged. "I'll see what I can do." He turned away, taking a peek out the window at where Tex and her Creeper, oddly named Andy, were; the blonde waved upon seeing him, to which he waved back. "Whelp, looks like this it." He smirked, nodding once at Tucker. "It's been real. Later dumbasses."

As soon as Church left, Caboose made a run for the door, but Tucker beat him to it, having to physically block the door from Caboose with two blocks of iron to make him stay put. "Caboose, stop!" He yelled, glaring a bit at the younger miner. "If he wants to go, let him; we don't need him anyhow!"

"No, I need Church!" Caboose howled, suddenly stopping, diving into his inventory.

Tucker looked away, sighing deeply. "Look, Caboose, I get that-" He stopped though as he turned upon hearing a thunk. When he turned around, an Iron Golem stood behind him, the door wide open as the Golem held a flower out to him peacefully.

Outside, Caboose was screeching for Church, looking around everywhere, but the cobalt dressed miner was long gone, having taken off with Tex as soon as he had gotten outside. Finally, the youngest blue miner collapsed to his knees in the field, right in front of the ravine separating the Blue Team from the Red Team. There, he began sobbing loudly, the Reds giving him almost guilty looks as they watched from afar, not daring to start anything after what had happened. Tucker soon made his way over to Caboose, rubbing the blue miner's back soothingly as Caboose sobbed, hoping to somehow comfort him.

"It'll be fine, man." Tucker assured Caboose, sighing again, watching the forest nearby with a sad expression. "We'll be just fine, you'll see."

* * *

><p>They certainly were not fine.<p>

It had been exactly two months since Church had left, and to say things were bad was an understatement. Not only were they low on resources, but Caboose was in no shape to fight, constantly holed up in the base, refusing to come out, which was very dangerous, considering he was the only guy in the canyon who was good at getting supplies without dying. Tucker had made attempts, yes, but he always ended up getting killed on the way back, making him lose lives way faster than he'd like. Not only that, but the Reds were also having a hard time, seeing as the Reds and Blues traded food for mining materials alot.

The Reds were low on mined materials, the Blues were low on food and resources.

In short, they were screwed unless things changed.

Tucker glared at the map splayed on the table in front of him, all of this brewing terribly in his head. He knew that fighting monsters could potentially get them a few resources, but not only would that not solve the Reds's mining problem, but zombie meat was not exactly the best source of protein (Last time Grif had eaten zombie meat, he had lost a life attempting to somehow outrun a horde of Skeletons, but had been unable to escape). He sighed, tossing the map into his inventory before picking up his sword; it was almost sun up, meaning most of the monsters would de-spawn.

It was time to try again.

The aqua miner stood up briskly, stopping at the door. "I'm going out!" He yelled. "You wanna come this time, Caboose?"

There was no reply.

"See ya later, buddy." Tucker called out before leaving through the front door; he knew better than to ask twice.

The aqua miner walked quickly over the bridge to Red Base. Although they fought constantly, they had reached a point where they agreed that relying on the Blues to get food was hopeless, so traveling together may prove more fruitful; today would be their first attempt at it. Upon reaching Red Base, Tucker was greeted by Donut, Simmons, and Grif, all dressed up and armed with Stone/Iron Swords. Donut seemed cheerful as could be, Grif looked just about ready to take a nap, and Simmons looked about as hopeful as a puppy in a pound. Tucker sighed, swinging his sword in the air boringly.

"Ready to hunt?" He asked, already knowing the answer.

"Did you bring Caboose?" Simmons asked at once.

"Nope." Tucker replied.

Simmons shrugged. "Then we may as well prepare to die."

"Oh come on, guys!" Donut cheered, still looking hopeful, despite the other men's severe lack of enthusiasm. "We can do it, we just gotta work together!"

"Easy for you to say; you've never seen an Endermen's eyes." Simmons pointed out, shivering deeply at the memory.

"What color were they?" Donut asked curiously.

Simmons froze, looking away. "I… Never mind, I don't wanna talk about it. Come on, last one to the forest is a rotten Ender E- Chicken Egg!" He corrected quickly.

The four miners quickly shoved off, presumably to find some food. For once, things seemed to be going quite well; Grif had managed to find some apples on the ground, Simmons had killed a few Cows, Donut had found a few chicken eggs, and Tucker had taken out plenty of Chickens and Pigs. By the time they bothered to stop, they looked around, surprised to find themselves way far from the forest. Last time they had checked, there were no deserts anywhere near Blood Gulch…

"Aw, fuck." Tucker muttered, looking around wildly.

Out of the frying pan, into the shit as they always say.

* * *

><p>"Woo hoo!"<p>

"Wait up, York!"

"Try to keep up, man!"

Three young Creative Mode miners flew through the air, occasionally even falling from great, great heights, just because they could. York was acting the wildest, not even bothering to fly, just using Ender Pearls to go from tree top to tree top. North was playing it safer, despite his obvious invincibility, flying softly through the air as his Chick, Theta, rode on his shoulder, occasionally rubbing tenderly against his neck. Washington was farther back, where no one could see him, deep in the forest brush.

"Fuck, did we lose Wash?" York asked, stopping to look around.

As if on cue, Washington burst out from the trees, riding a runaway pig. "Look out!" He shouted, his ocelot Epsilon hissing as he clung to Wash's back, the grey miner zooming over the canopy.

York burst into laughter. "Holy shit, you okay, Wash?"

"I'm getting that Achievement if it's the last thing I do; it's the only one no one's gotten yet beside that mine-cart thing!" Wash yelled over his shoulder.

"Wait, you turned off Creative!?" York asked, looking at Wash with wide eyes. "Are you nuts? You weren't born in Survival Mode; you only have three lives!"

"So what? 'Lina does it all the time; I'm not some helpless kid, York." Wash pointed out, holding onto the pig as he saw a cliff up ahead. "I'll be fine, I promise!"

"WASH!"

Washington suddenly snapped forward, seeing now that the cliff was much higher than he had at first thought, but it was too late. The pig rocketed off the edge, sending Wash and Epsilon with him. York, along with his wolf Delta, stopped at the edge, staring down with wide eyes as Wash soon crashed to the bottom, his whole body flashing blood red as he fell over; a small sentence popped up over his head 'Washington fell down too hard'. York and North winced, seeing Wash's body disappear, followed by Epsilon teleporting away, presumably to wherever his master spawned at. York and North exchanged a look.

"Maine, 'Lina, and Connie are not gonna be happy about this." North muttered, whistling loudly as he peered over the edge again. "That was a fucking drop of drops right there."

"No kidding." York agreed, Delta whimpering at his side, rubbing his muzzle into York's leg; the miner smiled reassuringly as he patted Delta's head. "S'kay, D. Wash'll be fine, he's a miner after all."

North nodded, turning away. "Come on, let's go break the news and round up a search party."

"If we're lucky, Wash dug himself a hole and is waiting patiently for us." York explained, grabbing a fishing rod and attaching it to Delta's bright green collar, guiding him away from the ledge.

"Or he'll try and make his way back on his own without bothering to make tools like a rational person." North muttered, Theta falling asleep on his shoulder.

"Yeah, or he'll do that." York agreed solemnly, trailing behind the much taller, purple armored miner.

* * *

><p>When Washington woke up, he immediately found himself to be staring up at the bright blue sky, Epsilon taking up a fraction of his vision as the black and white cat meowed in question above him.<p>

"Son of a bitch." Wash muttered, slapping his face. "Lina's gonna kill me… never should've trusted Wyoming with helping me turn my Creative Mode off… how 'm I supposed to get home now?"

Epsilon almost seemed to shrug, clambering on top of Wash, curling into a ball, and promptly taking a nap.

"Yeah, good call." Wash whispered, his vision still blurry and head still aching from the initial fall he had just suffered through; the biggest issue with turning off Creative was that actually dying in Survival was that much weirder and harsher, especially if you were born in Creative Mode like Wash and the other Freelancers had been.

"I'll worry about it when it's a bigger issue." Washington decided, rolling over and snuggling Epsilon close to his chest; at least Creepers will stay away, he thought hopefully.

* * *

><p>"Well, this is just fucking great." Tucker muttered, glaring around at the yellow sand as night began to fall. "Where even is the forest?"<p>

"Who the fuck knows?" Simmons replied, looking just as frustrated if not more so than Tucker. "Sarge is gonna be pissed!"

"Really, you're worried about Sarge at a time like this?" Grif questioned, unimpressed by the maroon miner's reaction. "I'd be more worried about Spiders, Simmons."

"Spiders!?" Donut squeaked, rushing to hide behind Grif. "I hate Spiders!"

Grif nodded in agreement. "Spiders, Simmons." He stated, poking Simmons annoyingly on the forehead. "Can't outrun a Spider."

Simmons scoffed, smacking Grif's hand away with a scowl on his face. "Maybe you can't outrun one, Grif, but that doesn't mean we can't."

"Don't you guys ever get anything done?" Tucker asked, exasperated.

"Actually, Grif might be right." Simmons finally said, looking very concerned. "If Grif gets hurt, we'll have to carry him; there are only three of us."

"Look, let's not jump to anything here!" Tucker instructed, yanking out his sword as the sun finally disappeared, a half moon rising on the horizon. "We'll be fine if we just-"

Ssssssssssssssssssssss

Ssssssssssssssssssssss

Ssssssssssssssssssssss

"Son of a bitch…" Tucker muttered darkly, pouting in defeat at the sandy ground.

* * *

><p>"Woman and children last!"<p>

"Oh shit, retreat!"

"Someone tell my mother I love her!"

"Oh God, I'm gonna die… *gasp* I'm gonna die…"

The four miners ran like all Hell was loose, making an attempt to outrun the four Creepers chasing them through the desert. They occasionally attempted shooting arrows at them, but it did little to stop their impending dooms. After only a few minutes, they were all panting heavily, barely able to keep going, seeing as their hunger was low from not only their lack of food at the bases, but from the fact that they'd wasted alot of it hunting and gathering all day. Tucker and the Reds soon managed to duck behind a slope, whimpering quietly as the hissing grew louder.

"We are so dead." Simmons whispered, looking horrified as he drew his bow, ready to fight to the death if it was necessary. "See you fuckers in Blood Gulch."

"We're not dead yet." Tucker announced, drawing his sword, swinging it in the air for extra effect. "I still have a few bars of Hunger left… I can get 'em if you guys distract a few away from me…"

At once, Simmons and Donut took off, running back over the slope and dashing around the Creepers, presumably to distract them for Tucker; one blew up though and took Donut out with him. "Donut!" Simmons shreaked in fear.

"He'll re-spawn on his bed, keep going!" Tucker instructed, running out and beginning his 'Hit 'n Run' trick at one of the Creepers, eventually taking it out. "Grif, run!"

"Fuck!" Grif shouted, running as fast as he could away from the Creepers, only to trip and fall flat on his face, soon being surrounded.

Simmons suddenly rushed in, just as the three remaining Creepers began to glow white. "Grif!" He yelled, diving in just as the explosion went off.

Tucker, even though he was farther away from the initial blast, was still knocked off his feet, rolling and rolling for what felt like hours but was really thirty-two seconds before he landed, somewhat harshly, behind another sand slope. The aqua miner groaned loudly, pulling off his mostly ruined helmet with a grunt, tossing it aside as he rubbed blood from his forehead. Finally, after a few minutes of terrifying and lonely silence, Tucker rolled over, coming face to face with a knocked out, grey dressed miner, who had a small black and white tamed ocelot held tight against his chest; cuts, bruises, and scrapes covered the poor sap's face.

"Fuck." Tucker muttered, rolling over to face the sky again, cursing loudly under his breath before he finally passed out from Hunger.

* * *

><p>"Tucker!" Was the first word screeched out of Donut's mouth when he woke up hours later, alone in Red Base, tucked into his bed. "Where-"<p>

"Easy there, soldier." Sarge instructed, pulling out a red potion from his inventory, pouring it into a small wooden bowl and handing it to the younger miner. "You took quite a spill according to them Blues."

"Where's Tucker?" Donut asked, worry creasing his face. "Last thing I knew, I was lodged in a Creeper sandwich!"

Sarge gave Donut a weird look, then shook it off. "He's fine, son." He assured him, nodding at the bowl. "Drink up; it'll help heal them scars on yer face better."

Donut moved a hand towards the hand-mirror on his nightstand, attempting to see the scars that may or may not be permanently scribed onto his face, but Sarge stopped him, his face stern. "Let's wait 'til later, boy. Not sure yer ready to see just yet…"

"Where is everyone?" Donut asked, determined as ever to learn about everything that had happened.

"Tucker's holed up in Blue Base with Caboose takin' care 'a that new Blue boy-" Sarge explained, brewing up another potion at the Enchantment Table. "-'N Simmons hasn't left Grif's side since he woke up… lazy bastard won't wake up yet."

"Wait, you're not making any sense." Donut pointed out, furrowing his brow at Sarge. "Why isn't Grif waking up, who's this Blue guy?"

Sarge shrugged, grumbling as he worked. "You know Grif's a lazy bastard, 'n that Blue boy was found in the desert along with the other Blue when I up and went after you boys! You're all damn lucky I found 'em, otherwise them Skeletons and Zombie woulda gotten 'em!"

Donut finally smiled after taking it all in, nodding at Sarge. "Thanks, sir." He answered, looking amazed. "That's so nice of you to help Tucker and a random stranger."

"Woulda killed 'em if it weren't for that damn cat!" Sarge shouted, banging his fist on the table as he remembered that Godawful feline. "Lil hairball up and took my bow! Lousy bastard… 'm tellin' ya, it had ta be a tiger, or some sorta big cat kitten thing-a-ma-jig…"

"What, like a puma?"

Both men snapped up and gazed over at the orange bed beside Donut, where Grif laid barely conscious, looking as bored as usual.

"Grif, you're alive!" Donut cheered, wincing however when he attempted to lift his arms up, deciding to instead just smile happily at him as an alternative. "You had me going th-"

"What in Sam Hell is a puma!?" Sarge boomed, interrupting Donut entirely, as if he didn't exist at all.

Grif blinked, unaffected by his leader's anger. "It's a puma, ya know, like a big cat." He made two pawing motions with both of his hands, as if to illiterate his point further. "It's a real animal."

"Yer makin' that up…" Sarge whispered in a deadly and serious tone, readying his back-up bow.

Meanwhile, Donut gave Simmons, who was lying lazily by Grif's side on the bed, a small chuckle. "Typical Red Team morning." He muttered.

Simmons nodded in agreement, yawning before he snuggled closer to Grif, enjoying the heat the chubbier man gave off.

Just a typical Red Team morning.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: The rest of the parts will be posted in quick succession up until part 7, where I'm still writing part 8. I plan on updates being at the very least by then every other week. We'll see though.  
><strong>

**~CabooseHeart.**


	2. Chapter 2

**Nether Worry**

**Part 2**

**AU: Minecraft/Red Vs. Blue**

**Pairing: Agent Washington/Tucker, Caboose/Church, Grif/Simmons**

**Description: Minecraft AU. In which the Reds and Blues come across a lonely Creative Mode dweller, Sarge makes about ten times more Iron Golems than are strictly necessary, and where Tucker learns that Wash is indeed not a replacement for Church and that may or may not be a bad thing after all.**

* * *

><p>"Tucker?"<p>

Sarge didn't even look up at Caboose as he dropped off a knocked out Tucker in front of Blue Base, along with an equally KO'd stranger. Caboose was peeking out from behind the door of the base, watching Sarge curiously as he started off towards Red Base, grumbling about lazy bastards and almost unheard worries for his men. Once he had crossed the bridge, Caboose fully emerged from the base, tiptoeing with caution towards Tucker and the stranger; both were covered in wounds, most small, considering they hadn't been killed. Caboose was gentle as he tossed Tucker over his shoulder, suddenly raising an eyebrow down at the stranger.

The blue miner crouched down, blue eyes wide as the young stranger stirred, blinking his eyes open to squint through the harsh light of dawn at Caboose. Caboose frowned, getting on his knees, angling Tucker to loosely hang on his back, Caboose's left arm held back to support the smaller Blue and keep him from falling off. The stranger hissed when Caboose pressed a hand against an open cut on his forehead, making Caboose pull back at once, as if he'd been burned. The stranger then closed his eyes, rolling over; it was only then Caboose noticed the cat in his arms, who gave Caboose a gentle meow of affection.

"Hello, Church." Caboose responded, grooming the kitty's fur kindly, to which the ocelot purred in satisfaction. "You are home now, I will keep you safe."

With that, Caboose scooped up the stranger with his right arm, still using the left to hold Tucker, and allowed the ocelot to clamber onto his open shoulder, rubbing against his cheek affectionately. Caboose grinned, something he hadn't done in a very long time, and walked on back into Blue Base, presumably to help his teammate and new friend recover.

* * *

><p>Tucker blinked awake about three hours later, groaning when he found out that he could hardly move; he'd barely been caught in that damn Creeper blast, but apparently, that didn't matter, now did it? When he finally managed to sit up, he looked to his left, surprised to find a stranger in Church's old bed. Now that he was more awake and in less pain than before, Tucker was more capable of studying the man beside him. The man couldn't be older than twenty-nine or thirty, having short, gruff blonde hair, and a small scar creasing just above his eyebrow. The cat was gone, to Tucker's surprise, but a meow above him made him gaze upward, frowning at the sight.<p>

"Dude, put him back." Tucker ordered, staring blankly at the ocelot perched on Caboose's shoulder. "He's not yours."

"But, Tucker!" Caboose whined, finally grinning at him, the cat being plucked off his shoulder and held sweetly against his chest. "It's Church!"

Tucker groaned. "Since when is Church a fucking pussy cat?" He asked aloud, rubbing his face with a bandage covered palm. "You'd better hope this guy doesn't kill you for touching his ocelot."

As if on cue, the stranger groaned aloud, blinking multiple times as he sat up, squinting at Tucker and Caboose. "Who're you?" He asked at once, voice weak from a lack of use over the last few hours.

"Who're we, who the fuck are you, dude?" Tucker asked, pouting at the older stranger with an odd glint in his eyes. "Never seen a guy like you from around here."

"That's 'cus I'm not." The man slurred out, rubbing his eyes, which were a grey/blue color that reminded Tucker briefly of a stormy day. "I'm from way up north, where the people there live in Creative Mode."

"Creative Mode?" Caboose repeated, looking confused. "What is a Creative Mode?"

Tucker shrugged. "Church talked about it sometimes, said Tex was from there or some shit."

"It's where you can never die." The stranger explained, ruffling his own hair lazily, to rid himself of his bedhead. "Also, you have unlimited resources and weapons of all sorts... all of my friends are living there."

"So, what's your name then?" Tucker finally asked, sick and tired of only thinking of him as 'Stranger'.

"Well, my friends all call me Washington or Wash." Washington told them, shrugging. "But my real name is-"

"Washingtub? Do you like baths?" Caboose interrupted, the ocelot meowing sleepily on his shoulder.

"Epsilon?" Wash asked, staring at the ocelot with wide eyes. "Wow, he must really like you; he bites and hisses at everyone else."

Caboose smiled, holding out the cat. "He is Church!" He yelled, patting the kitty's head. "He is my bestest friend!"

Wash gave Tucker a confused look.

Tucker sighed. "It's a long story." He stated, shaking his head in defeat. "So... you wanna see the rest of Blood Gulch?"

With a hesitant nod, Wash was helped to his feet by Caboose and Tucker, leaning on Tucker as the two walked out the base doors.

* * *

><p>Blood Gulch wasn't really a great place to live, but it was still home to all of them. No one was really sure how anyone got there (Tucker had been traveling for as long as he could remember until he ended up here with Flowers taking care of him, Simmons had showed up with a missing arm only to have Sarge take him in and give him a new iron one, Church almost killed Tucker while hunting way far out from home and ended up living with Flowers too, Grif showed up looking for his Sister but wound up living with Simmons and Sarge, and Donut and Caboose stayed after telling them all how their farm was destroyed by a horde of Spiders).<p>

They all stuck around for different reasons, some sweet, some ridiculous, and some just because, but they stayed in that shitty little plains biome, that had apparently glitched up somehow and closed them all in, the only way out being a thick forest that led to God knows where. But Flowers had died awhile back, not long before Caboose showed up, having accidentally eaten a Spider Eye and had died declaring Tucker as the leader. Tucker had, ultimately, handed that mantle to Church, declaring he really didn't want it.

So Church had been leader... until he left them, leaving Tucker, once again, as the leader of Blue Team.

"This place is huge." Wash exclaimed, staring at the wide canyon with curiosity in his eyes. "I've only ever lived in villages and mountains... this is gorgeous."

"We call it shit, but yeah, you can call it gorgeous or whatever." Tucker replied, watching from afar as Sarge began chopping down an oak tree. "Dude, you better replant more!" He screeched.

"Only on the Red side!" Sarge screamed back, taking all the saplings and charging back inside.

Tucker groaned. "So that's our neighbor." He muttered, shaking his head. "That was Sarge, but there's also Simmons, Grif, and Donut. PS, I think Donut's a chick."

"Why would I care?" Wash asked, raising an eyebrow. "There are plenty of chicks where I'm from."

"Dude, seriously?" Tucker asked, suddenly very interested in this guy's Creative Mode Land or wherever the fuck. "We only ever get a bunch of sweaty dudes!"

Wash only shrugged, still admiring the view. From afar, Tucker could see Sarge getting started up on something involving a Crafting Table and a shit ton of Pumpkins... this couldn't end well.

* * *

><p>"Sup." Grif muttered as he trotted outside, Donut not far behind him, half of his face still wrapped in a bloody gauze. "What ya doing?"<p>

"Simple, dirtbag." Sarge replied, grinning as he made tons upon tons of Iron Blocks. "I'm gettin' us here an army! Them Blues 're gonna have us outnumbered if we don't stop 'em! Look at 'em over there... scheming... those devilish bastards!"

Grif rolled his eyes, giving the Iron Blocks a once over. "Simmons is gonna lose it once he finds out you used all his Iron; he spent three days gathering that shit a few months back."

"He'll understand." Sarge assured Grif, finally starting on making Iron Golem after Iron Golem. "I need 'em for the war!"

"I don't even know if this is a war, Sarge." Donut said, smiling and waving at Caboose, who was playing with something he couldn't make out on the Blue's side of the canyon. "Man, I haven't seen Caboose in awhile... he must finally be getting better."

After a few minutes, Sarge ran out of Iron, only for Simmons to come trotting out of the base, staring at the Golems with impossibly wide eyes. "Sarge!" He screeched, seeing the Iron Golems picking a bunch of flowers and heading towards Blue Base. "Did you use all of our Iron!?"

"Why of course, how else would I of made so many?" Sarge asked, smirking as his little army headed across the bridge. "Look at 'em go, they're gonna rip 'em all to shreds... *sniff* I'm so proud."

"Do you even know what you've done!?" Simmons yelled, grabbing his own hair wildly, pulling at the orange tangles like a mad man.

Donut stared with wide eyes. "Wow, I've never seen Simmons that mad before."

Grif nodded in agreement, stretching as he yawned.

"I don't see the problem." Sarge replied honestly, giving Simmons a curious look. "We'll be fine; we've got an army now, see!"

"But you used all of our Iron!" Simmons shouted. "Now we'll have to get more, and we don't even have Tex to help us this time; how else are we gonna stop all of those Mobs if we don't have her to help!?"

Sarge nodded, taking it in. "I still think it's fine, Simmons." He stated, grinning as one of the Golems finally reached Washington, who still hadn't noticed it yet. "Look! Now you'll see that it was necessary in order to win the war against them dirty Blues!"

* * *

><p>"Washingtub, look!" Caboose yelled, pointing at the Iron Golem behind Wash with a delighted grin, hopping up and down. "It is a friendly man!"<p>

Wash turned around, staring up at the huge Golem towering over him. He yelped, ready to bolt, but stopped as the Iron Golem held out a tiny yellow flower, making a loud 'Clunk' as it did so, looking at Wash expectantly. Very hesitantly, the young miner grabbed the flower, the Iron Golem automatically letting go and walking back to Red Base. He stared, not knowing how to respond. Tucker immediately lost it, collapsing to the ground in a loud fit of giggles and shrieks, to which Caboose copied, not holding back at all as he fell over, landing on Wash, who instead shrieked in terrible pain rather than happiness.

"I-I-I can't _breathe_!"

"HAHAHAHAHA!"

_*Loud Incoherent Sobbing*_

* * *

><p>"Hey, Sarge, want some flowers?" Simmons asked, holding out a bundle of roses out to Sarge. 'Cus, ya know, they're apparently more essential than fucking iron."<p>

"Aw, shut up." Sarge muttered, ignoring the five Iron Golems surrounding him, all holding out a flower each.

* * *

><p>Three days later and all of the Iron Golems, Blue Team, and Red Team were wearing flower crowns made by Donut; they knew better than to question it all.<p>

* * *

><p>"Do you miss them?"<p>

Washington glanced over his shoulder from where he was sitting in front of the window, having a staring contest of sorts with a Zombie intent on staring back from the other side of the window, ignoring the rain entirely. Tucker was sat at the tiny table in the middle of the base, fiddling with a wooden sword he had made for no particular reason other than boredom. It was pouring outside, making it damn near impossible to go out seeing as every monster but Endermen were content in it, free to wander even during the usual daylight hours. Caboose was laying on the Cobblestone floor, looking to be playing with Epsilon peacefully.

"Sometimes." Wash admitted, staring back outside, watching the Zombie put his hand on his side of the window; Wash put his over it, copying the Mob. "I know they're looking for me though."

"Would you leave if they came here?" Tucker asked, staring more seriously at Wash. "Would you just grab Epsilon and go?"

It was quiet for a long time, the only sounds being the Zombie moaning, Epsilon's content meows and purrs, and the rain outdoors. Finally, Wash sighed, looking away from his sort-of-not friend Zombie, gazing deep into Tucker's sharp grey eyes.

"I might." Wash admitted, swallowing loudly. "I gave Epsilon to Caboose... he obviously needs him more... if my friends all show up one day... I dunno, I'll figure it out."

"What does that mean, Washingtub?" Caboose asked, looking up from where he was on the floor, Epsilon also glancing up at his old master.

"It means I still owe you guys." Wash stated, scratching his head in deep thought. "I'm not sure if I'm quite ready to leave either; I still wanna see more of this canyon, you know?"

"I get it." Tucker replied, nodding in understanding. "But don't worry about it if your weird Creative buddies show up, kay?"

Wash only nodded back, looking outwards, seeing the Zombie now gone; off in the distance, Simmons and Grif were tossing snowballs from God knows where at each other, screeching whenever Donut joined in and started actually injured them. Sarge was also there, grinning as he fought a few monsters, seeing as he was close enough to home and there wasn't any real danger in fighting a few. Wash smiled, mentally asking himself when he'd started loving being here so much; he still missed his friends, and really needed to get back to them before anything bad happened, but for now...

This was home.

* * *

><p>"Run!"<p>

"Oh crap!"

Both Simmons and Grif screeched as Donut chased them around in the rain, tossing snowballs at them like no man's business; not only did they do damage, but they sure as fuck stung! Sarge watched with a peaceful look in his eyes, preferring to simply watch instead of join in; he felt he was too old to be getting nearly killed by Donut's snowballs anyhow. He smiled though, slinging his sword over his shoulder as he turned towards the woods, having already killed every monster near Red Base. He looked over his shoulder at the rest of his team, watching Grif and Simmons collapse and dry-heave into the muddy ground, while Donut stood over them, apologizing endlessly.

"Hey!" Sarge yelled, catching his team's attention. "I'm headin' out for a spell, you three try not to kill each other while I'm gone, ya hear?"

"Yes, sir!" Simmons wheezed back, his knees shaking as he stood slouching, he saluted, whimpering at the pull on his muscles. "Are you sure you'll be okay?"

"Boy, who you think yer talkin' to, huh?" Sarge asked in return, waltzing off into the forest, whistling some sort of old song off-tune to himself as he went.

The old miner walked through the forest without many worries, surprised at times when the Creepers hanging about ignored him; it kinda helped when he smelled like a cat thanks to Epsilon. Sarge hurried past a few trees, stopping at a river to crotch down and have a drink, his lungs burning slightly from too much energy being used; he supposed he really was getting too old for this shit. After a minute or so of restoring a bit of his thirst, Sarge sat back on the grass, his sword resting on his lap lazily. He yawned, feeling almost like Grif, and was tempted to nap, but knew better, what with the Mobs being out and all.

Out of nowhere, however, a Skeleton ran at Sarge, managing to nick him in the arm with an arrow. The man cried out, on his feet in seconds, his sword managing to swing and slash a rib off of the Skeleton. Sarge growled, ready to attack again, only to have his sword knocked clean out of his grasp. He yelped, ducking as another few arrows soared his way. He started backing away, arrows being launched at him until he was cornered by a slope of dirt, the Skeleton blocking any way out. Sarge cursed, still ready to fight, even with his bare hands, when out of seemingly nowhere, a huge wolf launched out at the Skeleton.

The beast of a Mob pinned the Skeleton in seconds, tearing it apart. Sarge watched with wide eyes, seeing a few spare bones fall before him. He smiled, picking them up delicately as he tiptoed over to the mighty wolf, seeing it munch aggressively on the remains of the Skeleton. Now able to see it better as the rain passed, the moon taking it's place, Sarge was capable of seeing the wolf's dark brown fur clear as day, tarnished and dirty from living out in the wild. Sarge whistled, making the wolf stop and turn around, sitting and tilting his head as he saw the bones in Sarge's hand, making a soft yip as a way of begging.

"That's a good boy." Sarge praised, smirking at the animal. "Here, take it." He held the bones out to the beast carefully.

The wolf obediently took them, literally wolfing them down. With a satisfied yip, the wolf sat again in front of Sarge, tail wagging happily. "That's all I got, boy." Sarge explained, backing away. "I don't got no more."

None-the-less, the wolf stood and shook itself off, following Sarge out of the forest, much like an obedient dog would. The miner sighed, a curve to his lips as the animal followed him home; he could always use another teammate.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Please R&R!**

**~CabooseHeart.**


	3. Chapter 3

**Nether Worry**

**Part 3  
><strong>

**AU: Minecraft/Red Vs. Blue**

**Pairing: Agent Washington/Tucker, Caboose/Church, Grif/Simmons**

**Description: Minecraft AU. In which the Reds and Blues come across a lonely Creative Mode dweller, Sarge makes about ten times more Iron Golems than are strictly necessary, and where Tucker learns that Wash is indeed not a replacement for Church and that may or may not be a bad thing after all.**

* * *

><p>"What the fuck is that?" Grif asked twenty minutes later, staring down at the massive brown wolf.<p>

Sarge glared at Grif from where he was squatted on the floor of the base, clicking a red leather collar around his new wolf's neck. "It's a wolf, dumbnuts."

Simmons raised an eyebrow at the wolf, looking it over. "What's his name, sir?" He asked, patting it's head after a moment.

"Lopez." Sarge announced, running his fingers through the wolf's fur kindly, smirking when it barked and wagged it's tail.

"He's so cute!" Donut declared, getting on his knees in front of the dog-like pet, looking him over curiously. "I can totally manicure his nails and make him look so cute! Oh man, he needs a cute little bandana around his neck, with cupcakes on it!"

"Stop torturing my dog!" Sarge yelled, hugging the wolf awkwardly, patting it's head. "He's not some fancy pantsy runway poodle; he's a killing machine run on steroids and a boner for murder!"

Grif blinked, not at all intimidated by Sarge's explanation. "He looks kinda dumb." He commented, shrugging at the beast. "I'm more of a cat person to be honest."

"Grif," Sarge began, Lopez growling at his side. "I'm givin' ya ten seconds to run before I let Lopez here do whatever he wants to ya."

That got Grif's attention. "It's not to offend him, I just, you know… BYE!" He burst out the door, screeched as Sarge let go of Lopez, letting the wolf go after him.

The rest of the Red Team watched as Lopez chased Grif around the canyon, barking and growling as Grif rushed towards Blue Base, barely being able to make a stairway onto the roof, breaking it once he was high enough away from the wolf. Lopez sat patiently in the wet grass, tail wagging as he tilted his head; Sarge grinned, knowing it would be a long night for Grif.

"Should we help him?" Simmons asked, giving Grif a very concerned look.

"Naw, I think Lopez has it covered." Donut replied, squinting to see better as he stared out the window beside Simmons.

"No, I mean, maybe we should help Grif," Simmons explained, frowning at the outside world. "I mean, even he doesn't deserve this shit."

Sarge rolled his eyes. "Oh get over it!" He ordered, plopping onto his bed with a groan. "Jus' go ta bed."

Simmons sighed, walking out the door. "Where are you going, Simmons?" Donut asked, furrowing his brow as Simmons headed on outside, just as the rain started again.

Simmons didn't reply, he only walked faster.

* * *

><p>Grif was panting loudly as he laid on top Blue Base, screeching whenever a Zombie or Skeleton spawned on there with him, causing him to him kill them in a panic or at least get them off the roof to deal with Lopez, who killed them immediately. Suddenly though, he heard soft thunking, much like someone placing down something wooden. He stared with wide eyes as Simmons more or less crawled onto the roof via ladder, plopping down beside him. The maroon miner didn't say a word as he set down two beds beside each other, setting up tons of torches around them as he did so, making a little monster-safe zone on the Blue Base roof, leaving Grif confused.<p>

"The fuck is this?" Grif asked.

Simmons grabbed Grif's arm, tugging him onto the double bed. "It's called not leaving you out here all night in the rain." He explained, setting up a tiny roof using fences and wooden planks above the bed.

Grif smirked, leaning on Simmons as the two laid down on the bed. "I always knew you digged me." He stated matter-of-factly.

"Grif, we've been dating for three and a half months." Simmons reminded the orange miner, unimpressed by the other man's statement. "Pretty sure I digged you."

"I know; this just means you really love me, like, enough to sleep in the rain with me." Grif explained, wrapping his arms around the other man lazily. "Night, nerd."

"Night, fatass." Simmons replied, yawning as he cuddled up to his boyfriend, ignoring the storm the best he could.

* * *

><p>The next morning, the footsteps of a very young miner echoed through the forest, the soft 'whoops' of another creature following them. Eventually, Kaikaina Grif stopped, staring out upon the canyon before her with a grin, Crunchbite teleporting to join her in gazing at the canyon. The young girl giggled, grabbing her Endermen friend's hand as she walked towards the bases inside, stopping to turn and look at him, her colorblindness being the only thing stopping the Endermen from killing her, seeing as the girl couldn't tell what color it's eyes were in the first place.<p>

"I'm gonna go find Dex." Kaikaina explained, hugging Crunchbite softly. "You go find your hero or whatever; see ya soon."

The Endermen teleported away, leaving Kai alone to stare hopefully at Red Base; surely Dex would be there, he loved the color red!

* * *

><p>"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"<p>

Washington was awake at once, jumping out of bed in a fury before he stood, Stone Sword drawn and ready for combat. Immediately, Tucker slammed the front door shut upon entering, a loud Endermen scream echoing behind him. The aqua miner was whimpering loudly, his whole body shaking nonstop as he held his Diamond Sword to his chest, as if it were a lifeline. Wash softened, seeing Tucker was okay, and walked carefully over to the much younger miner, seeing Tucker yelp aloud when the Endermen outside screamed again, making even Wash shiver; Carolina used to love telling tales of her Survival Mode adventures, including Endermen related ones.

"Tucker, what happened?" Wash asked, looking Tucker over; no injuries, must've been able to outrun it home.

"It saw my sword and fucking lost it, I dunno, but it's gonna kill me!" Tucker explained, panicking wildly. "I never looked at it's eyes, I swear."

Wash nodded, taking a deep breath as he readied his sword… just a few hits and it would be gone… he could manage it. "Stay here." He ordered, moving past Tucker as he readied his sword. "I'll take care of this mess."

Before he could step out though, a loud screech interrupted him from outside, making Wash swallow, eyes going impossibly wide. That had to be Caboose, it had to be. "No, do not hurt him!"

"Caboose?" Tucker called, pressing up against the door carefully, an obvious fear still thrilling his bones. "Why the fuck not, man? That thing is evil! It is literally a spawn of Herobrine… I think."

"He is my friend!" Caboose declared; Wash peeked out the window by the door, seeing that Caboose had his arms wrapped around the Endermen's waist. "He is not an Endermen; he is a Friendermen!"

Washington cursed loudly, shaking his head. "Fuck." He muttered, turning towards the roof ladder. "Tucker, wait here, I'll be back in a few minutes… if I die and York shows up, punch him in the good eye for taking so damn long."

Tucker nodded, watching Wash silently. "Careful, dude; those things are hardcore."

The young Ex-Creative Mode player climbed up onto the roof, the morning sun amazingly enough not spooking the Endermen underground. He shrugged it off, but stopped as he spotted Simmons and Grif, both fast asleep on their roof, appearing to be snuggling. 'I'll worry about it later', He told himself, scooting around the slumbering miners, smiling almost fondly at them as he passed by. At least some people could find happiness in this messed up world. Wash finally reached the end of the roof, where he peeked over the edge, seeing the Endermen screaming at the door as Caboose hugged him, occasionally rubbing his cheek against him to boot.

This couldn't end well.

"Caboose!" Wash called, grabbing both the Endermen and Caboose's attention. 'It won't hurt you' He reminded himself, breathing warily, 'It's locked onto Tucker, not you'. "I need you to let go of him, Caboose!"

"But you will kill him!" Caboose replied, hugging his new friend tighter. Wash was surprised that the Endermen hadn't shooed Caboose away or screamed at him to scare him off; it must've had amazing tolerance level. "He will not hurt people! He is a good Friendermen!"

Wash sighed, rubbing his temple as he closed his eyes, trying to cool down his initial anger towards the situation; it was fine, Caboose just wanted to help it, no harm in that. "Look, we can work something out, Caboose! It doesn't need to be this way." He felt like he was talking to a serial killer who was holding a child hostage.

"Do you promise?" Caboose asked, looking hopeful.

Wash smiled an honest one, nodding at the blue miner. "Of course, Caboose."

"Pinky promise?" Caboose edged on, holding out his pinky to Wash, having to get on his tiptoes to even reach him.

For a beat, Wash considered turning him down, but the Endermen's bright pink eyes flashed, as well as a soft and threatening low screech entering the air; great, the Endermen was on Caboose's side, that couldn't possibly end badly. "Pinky promise." He confirmed, shaking pinky fingers with the younger miner.

He'd regret this, he knew that much.

* * *

><p>"Who in Sam Hell are you?" Sarge boomed, glaring down from the top of Red Base at the young, yellow clad miner; she couldn't be older than eighteen or nineteen.<p>

"My name's Kai!" Kaikaina explained, grinning up at the older red miner. "Hey, old guy, you seen my bro? His names Dex!"

"Get off my lawn!" Sarge replied, firing an arrow at the girl's feet; she was unaffected. "I don't know no Dex's!"

Donut popped onto the roof from the ladder, giving Kai a curious look. "Who's she, sir?" He asked, pouting at the young girl.

Sarge shrugged, reloading his bow. "I don't know and I don't care; she's not from here, which means she can't be Red, and if that tall freak she was traveling with went to Blue Base… dear Notch, they've called for reinforcements, those dirty Blues!"

"Hey, pinky!" Kai yelled, catching Donut's attention. "You don't seem like an old jerk; you seen my brother or what?"

"What's he look like?" Donut asked. "And by the way, it's not 'pink', it's lightish red, obviously."

Kai shrugged. "He's kinda fat, and slow, also knowing him he's probably figured out he's hella gay by now; always thought he had to be. Anyways, he's also kinda short, and Hawaiian, guess that's important, he also hates Bats!"

Sarge and Donut only stared at each other, both with equally bored expressions on their faces. "Grif." They deadpanned.

* * *

><p>"Okay… so now that we have decided to keep you… you need a real name!" Caboose explained, smiling up at the Endermen sitting politely at their kitchen table. "I vote for Fluffy."<p>

"Fluffy?" Wash repeated, obviously confused. "Why Fluffy?"

"Fluffy; the Friendermen who only loves!" Caboose shouted, making the Endermen almost make a groan, not at all agreeing with the miner.

Tucker was hiding under the table, not trusting that thing to be docile yet. "That's a stupid name!" He yelled, pouting when the Endermen hissed upon hearing his voice. "Oh shut it, you're not helping."

Wash shrugged, sneaking a piece of toast to Tucker, seeing as they were currently having breakfast and the Endermen was making it hard for Tucker to grab some food of his own. "How about something less… demeaning?" He suggested, sipping his apple juice carefully. "How about Seattle?"

"Boo!" Tucker cheered, smacking Wash in the leg, earning a muffled yelp from the receiver. "That's even worse!"

"Alright, smartass," Wash replied, smirking at what he could make out of Tucker. "What do you suggest for him, huh?"

Before Tucker could quite possibly offend the Endermen and his teammates further, Kai charged in, followed by an overly cautious Sarge and a peaceful looking Donut. "Hey!" She yelled, grinning nice and wide. "You seen by bro?"

Wash set his juice down, looking Kai up and down cautiously. "First of all, who are you? Second, why in Notch's name did you just burst into this base like a pig wearing a saddle?" He knew that second part from experience.

"What's with all the questions?" Kai asked, squinting at Wash. "What're you, like a cop or something?"

"I don't even know what a cop is." Wash pointed out, glaring right back at Kai. "I've never been to the city."

"Whatever cop." Kai replied, grinning when she saw Tucker. "Oh, is that your boyfriend?" She asked, crawling under the table to talk with him.

Wash blushed bright red, unable to deny it before Kai was down there, possibly getting into mischief. "I'm hoping you can explain this." He said, pointing his question at Sarge.

Sarge shrugged, bow level with Wash's head; the miner was unmoved by this. "She's lookin' for Grif… you seen that lazy bastard?"

"Sleeping on our roof." Wash explained, pointing his thumb in the general direction of the ladder. "Simmons is there too."

"Got it." Sarge muttered, waltzing on over to the ladder. "Come on, Donut."

Donut shook his head, seating him on the other side of the Endermen. "I think I'll skip, Sarge; this new Blue guy is really interesting!" He explained.

Sarge only shook his head, continuing up the ladder; he'd never understand kids these days with their fancy pancy weapons and crazy obsessions with monsters and idiotic stunts.

* * *

><p>"Alright, cuddle puddle is over!" Sarge announced minutes later, tugging the blanket off of Simmons and Grif, who he was happy to see were fully clothed. "Come on, up at at 'em, miners."<p>

"Ugh!" Grif groaned out, using his arm that wasn't wrapped around Simmons to block out the sun efficiently. "Is that sunlight?"

"You bet yer rations it is!" Sarge yelled, grinning at the look of honest distaste on his miner's face; it was looking to be a good day after all. "Now get yer ass up, you got a visitor."

"Better not be another Creeper, because I swear to Notch, Sarge, if you-" Grif was cut off, however, when a nineteen year old girl slammed into him like a fuck train with no breaks.

Simmons awoke with a screech, feeling someone's cold feet smack him in the face. "Goddammit, Grif!" He yelled, squirming away and rolling off of the bed, landing on his ass. "I told you not to touch me with your cold fucking feet!"

Grif, however, was too busy being hugged and kissed on the cheek to hear him, his younger sister being more clutchy than usual. "Kai!?" He finally asked, pulling her away enough to breathe. "What're you doing here? I told you to stay in the Mushroom biome; monsters don't spawn there!"

"Fuck that!" Kai replied, waving her brother's anger off like it was normal, which it probably was for her. "I got bored of mushrooms, they weren't even the fun kind! So, I met this weird Endermen dude who offered to help me find you, and here we are!" She hugged Grif again, smiling brightly.

"Wait, what!?" Grif shouted, pulling her away again. "What Endermen? How did you get here? Where's the cat? Wh-" He was cut off with a sharp slap from Kai to calm him down. "Thank you."

"No problem, Dex." Kai replied, patting him on the head.

"It's not 'Dex' here, it's Grif." Grif explained, stepping off of the bed, Sister stepping off with him. "And we can't call ya Kai since Sarge hates first names… guess we'll call you Sister."

Sister wasn't as impressed. "That's kinda dumb." She pointed out, but was distracted when Tucker, Caboose, Sarge, Wash, and Donut joined them on the roof. "Hey, look, it's Pinky, Cop, Tall Blue Guy, Old Jerk, and Pencil Dick!"

Tucker groaned. "It's Tucker." He repeated for what must've been the millionth time that morning.

Sister brushed it off. "Whatever." She grabbed Grif's arm, leading him towards the ladder. "Man, have I got a story to tell!" She announced, leading the way in what was definitely going to be one Hell of an adventure. "You guys are gonna love it!"

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Please R&R!  
><strong>

**~CabooseHeart.**


	4. Chapter 4

**Nether Worry**

**Part 4**

**Pairing: Agent Washington/Tucker, Caboose/Church, Grif/Simmons**

**Description: In which the Reds and Blues come across a lonely Creative Mode dweller, Sarge makes about ten times more Iron Golems than are strictly necessary, and where Tucker learns that Wash is indeed not a replacement for Church and that may or may not be a bad thing after all.**

**A/N: Removed the story from the from the crossover stuff so people can actually find it, hope nobody minds! Updates on Fridays, starting tomorrow!**

* * *

><p>"Wait wait wait, so you're telling us... you swam all the way from a huge mushroom island, hitched a ride with some horse owner who you later fucked, lasted ten days in a desert without any food what-so-ever, met an Endermen who you could magically understand who wouldn't kill you because you're color blind, went on a huge month long adventure through underground caves, then popped up in a village, fucked half the villagers, and ended up in Blood Gulch!?" Wash asked, looking Sister up and down carefully.<p>

"Yep, pretty neat, huh?" Sister asked, grinning happily as she sat on one of the beds in Blue Base. "It was, like, so boring underground though; everybody kept getting up in my face like 'I'm a Skeleton'. It's like, yeah, I'm kinda aware of that, thanks; then I'd shiv them with my Hoe-."

"Wait, what!?" Simmons squeaked out, eyes wide, mouth agape as he stared at the girl who could not possibly be related to his fatass boyfriend.

"Yeah, right? Those guys were such assholes!" Sister stated matter-of-factly, nodding to the miners surrounding her. "But I'm okay; Crunchbite got into a few scraps, but no biggie."

Grif groaned, shaking his head. "Great, just great; my sister is in the middle of what is most likely the worst place on Earth and I can't do shit about it. I told you to stay on the island, Kai!"

Sister rolled her eyes, glaring at Grif. "But you never came back, Dex! Look, I waited for a long time, and nobody ever showed up; I had to eat the cows there, Grif. Those cows only tasted like mushrooms; everything tasted like shitty mushrooms! So I did what I had to do, you can at least act like you missed me!"

"Of course I did; I was worried sick, but I couldn't just up and leave!" Grif sighed, looking away from his younger sister. "Look, I'm sorry I kinda ditched you, but I kinda... got attached to people here; it's complicated. Anyway, I'm glad you're safe, I can sleep easier now-"

"You had trouble sleeping?" Donut questioned, not looking convinced. "You were out in ten seconds almost every night!"

Sister gasped, suddenly tackle-hugging Grif, grinning as she did so. "You did miss me!" She squealed, laughing loudly. "You never take that long to fall asleep at night!"

Sarge stared, looking both amused and angry. "I have no idea what I'm even lookin' at anymore." He stated, turning towards the door. "Come on, men. Grif, grab yer sister and let's skedaddle!"

Grif nodded, grasping Sister's arm. "Come on, Kai." He ordered, heading for the door at a faster pace than usual.

"Wait..." Sister forced Grif to let go, backing away to stand beside the Blues. "Maybe I could... stay here?" She suggested.

"Wait, what!?" Both Washington and Sarge yelled at the same time, staring at the hazel haired girl wildly.

"Well, Red Team's already got a ton of dudes..." Sister trailed off again.

"We literally have an always tired fatass, an unappreciated genius, a possibly insane ex-underground miner nutcase, the most girly man on Earth who we're still betting is gay as fuck, and a brown wolf demon bent on killing everybody but Sarge, but I still think that thing might go traitor on him soon." Simmons explained, looking his own team over as he spoke. "Why would you join Blue Team?"

"Because we have a psychopath Creative Mode cat-lover, a complete idiot who's never once died, an amazingly attractive warrior, and a cat who hates everyone. You have one more guy than us." Tucker pointed out, crossing his arms. "Besides, Donut is already the girl for your team."

Sarge glared at Tucker, re-loading his bow. "You'll be down another if ya don't release the prisoner!"

"What prisoner!?" Wash screeched, his voice going up an octave. "I'm not even sure if anyone here is sane anymore; let's all just drop it and vote!"

"But they'll all vote for Sister to join them!" Tucker yelled.

"Epsilon can't vote though..." Donut stated.

"Well neither can your freak demon dog!" Sister yelled, hands on her hips.

Caboose tisked at them all. "Not very Democratic..." He said, looking disappointed. "Everybody has the right to vote; it is the law."

"Maybe on the moon it is!" Tucker screamed, seeing as he could barely be heard over the continued arguing of Red Team.

"Everyone just calm down!" Wash yelled, but his yelling was unheard in the chaos of Blue Base, especially as arrows started being shot through the air. "Fuck, watch it!"

"Give her up!" Sarge ordered, yanking out his sword and jumping Wash, getting ready to kill him.

Tucker immediately tackled Sarge, his Diamond Sword swinging. "Get off of him, dumbass! He only has two lives left!"

"Stay outta this you-"

"SCREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!"

Everyone went still, shivering so violently that their heads hurt. Sister was the first to look up (The only one) at Crunchbite, giving him an honestly sorry look. "Okay... okay, let's all calm it..." She suggested, backing off from Donut and the rest of Red Team.

The Reds and Blues were all sprawled out wildly; Wash was still flat on his back on the floor, Simmons was looking ready to stab Caboose with Grif's help, Caboose was holding up both Grif and Simmons by the back's of their chest armor, Donut and Sister looked ready to start sword fighting, and Tucker had Sarge pinned to the floor with a Diamond Sword at his throat. They all separated slowly, mumbling apologizes and small threats, until they were all on separate ends of the room, Red versus Blue once more. Crunchbite was staring down at them all, looking ready to murder at even the slightest provocation. Wash was the first to speak, seeing as he was the least belonging to the Reds and Blues (Besides Sister).

"I think that's enough." Wash said, breathing heavily still, adrenaline running sharply through his veins. "We need to stop before someone gets hurt."

"Fine." Sarge snapped it out so bitterly... the next few days would be tense for sure.

"I'm staying here." Sister stated, looping an arm around Crunchbite. "And so is he; he's got shit to do and all that."

Grif looked ready to protest, but a tiny growl/hiss stopped him, making him back away a step. "Alright then... but you keep outta fights, okay?"

"Can't promise that." Sister replied, a smile appearing on her face again; it brought in a little more sunlight, bleeding away alot of the tension.

Tucker grinned, grabbing Sister's arm somewhat gently and pulling her closer to himself. "Don't worry baby, I'll protect you."

"Yeah, that's what the last guy said, and I'm still scratching!" Sister explained excitedly, no shame what-so-ever.

"Wait, what?" Tucker asked, but could only laugh with Sister as she began to, holding his sides as he did so.

Wash watched, just a bit of jealousy filling his head; why should he even be jealous, it's not like he'd like to make Tucker laugh that way! No, he wasn't jealous, he didn't care at all; he was supposed to just make himself useful until his friends found him... no need to get attached or anything. The grey miner walked away slowly, after the Reds had left, and kept to himself that day with the excuse of hunting.

He wasn't jealous.

He didn't care.

...

Sister and Tucker started going at it after three days.

Washington pretended he didn't notice.

...

"Hey, cop guy!" Sister yelled a few days later, walking up to Wash.

Washington had been practicing his bow and arrow skills that morning when Sister showed up, to which he began ignoring her once again, pretending he hadn't even heard her. "Oh come on, cop! What did I do to you?" Sister asked, looking the man over. "Did I piss you off or something?"

"Why'd you join Blue Team?" Wash asked suddenly, not looking up from where he was fixing up a few arrows. "Your brother is on Red Team; seems only reasonable that you'd join him."

"Well... it's complicated; sibling stuff, ya know?" Sister explained, taking a seat on a dirt block beside Wash, watching what he was doing from over his shoulder. "Besides... pretty sure none of the guys on Red Team are exactly great fuck-buddies; the old guy is old and gross, my bro is dating that one nerd guy, pinky is kinda... well I'm not gonna even ask, and then there's a dog."

Wash nodded, eyes fixated on the ground; if Carolina or Maine were around, they'd accuse him of being childish. "I guess I could understand that." He muttered aloud, finally looking up at Sister, grey/blue eyes meeting bright browns. "I have a sister of my own."

Sister was suddenly laying on her stomach on the block, eyes trained on Wash. "Oooooooooooh, gossip, hm?"

"No," Wash replied, stuffing the now fixed arrows away into his inventory. "It's not gossip, it's just... my sister."

"Older or younger?" Sister asked, smiling as she pulled out bread from her own inventory, tossing a piece to Wash.

Wash caught the bread with ease, taking a small bite, copying after Sister. "Older." He stated, sighing around his snack. "Her name is Carol."

"That's a cute name, is she hot?" Sister asked at once; right to the point it seemed.

"She's too old for you; also, she's already in a relationship with one of our other friends." Wash explained, finishing quickly, taking a seat beside Sister.

"Boo," Sister muttered sadly, staring at the ground. "So... where is she now? She still around or is she dead?"

Wash shrugged, looking away. "No idea," He admitted, sighing deeply. "I got separated from my friends a few months ago... I still have no idea where the Hell they even are."

"Why don't you go find them?" Sister questioned. "I mean, that's what I did, and I even found my bro!"

"Well, it's not that simple." Wash said, sitting up slightly. "You see, I'm from Creative Mode; people in Creative Mode are more or less invincible to everything, but... I turned mine off. I'm not sure how my friend Wyoming managed it, but he helped me turn it off, just like he did when Florida wanted to travel the world as a free spirit. Anyway, I was only doing it to get an Achievement... but I got killed, so now I only have two lives left and my friends are probably looking everywhere for me." He looked away, his brow furrowing. "Sorry if I'm talking too much..."

Sister was quiet for a long time, legs swinging as she hummed, Wash not saying a word as she did so. Finally, Sister spoke up, this time with a gentleness in her voice. "Sorry I started fucking Tucker."

Wash's eyes went wide, looking Sister over, as if she were a Zombie or something. "Wait, what?"

"Sorry I'm fucking the guy you're into." Sister repeated, smiling honestly at the much older man. "I just wanted to be with someone I guess; I'll back off if you want."

"Uh..." Wash couldn't really come up with a reply to that, seeing as he was still trying to figure out how Sister had known in the first place. "You don't... I guess-"

"Dude," Sister interrupted, placing her hand securely over Wash's mouth. "I get it, you're still all-" She waved her hands in the air a bit, trying not to laugh. "-Figuring it out. I'll still back off a bit though... you know, give you some room to make a move."

Wash nodded, a pleasant sigh leaving his mouth for once. "Thanks, I guess." He replied, scratching the back of his head.

Sister patted him on the back, still smiling. "No problem, dude. No problem."

...

Tucker and Sister stopped having sex; nothing changed besides a lack of noise at night and kisses in the morning.

Wash pretended he didn't feel guilty when Tucker seemed sadder.

...

"You're leaving?" Wash asked.

A half month had passed, when things were finally calm again, when Tucker has been spending less time with Kai, when Lopez stopped growling all night at Grif, when Kai and Grif seemed to get over their old arguments; things were finally not exploding or going wrong, just the way Wash liked them. Tucker had a backpack on, Caboose chattering endlessly behind him to Sister and Crunchbite about something involving parties and wizards. The darker skinned man looked almost... regretful, yet a bit excited.

"Only for a bit." He promised, securing his pack more. "I'd bring you, but I'm not risking your life in some sorta adventure."

Wash nodded, pretending that his lack of lives didn't bother him. "It'll only be a little while, right?"

"Of course," Tucker said, as if Wash should've known that from minute one. "I'm not gonna be an asshole and not come back."

"I know," Wash assured Tucker, nodding at the ground. "I'm just worried is all, not like you have unlimited lives or anything."

"Dude," The way Tucker said it implied to Wash that he was about to be sarcastic. "We're bringing Caboose, the same moron whose never lost a life before; we'll be fine."

Wash only nodded, keeping his eyes on the floor before glancing back up, smiling a bit. "See you when you get back then..."

Tucker smiled, nodding back at Wash. "It'll only be a few weeks at the most; I just gotta go be some big hero to the Endermen or something, then I'll be back!"

None-the-less, Wash doubted Tucker would be fine upon getting back, but then again, he doubted alot of things.

'Tucker will be fine', Wash assured himself, sighing deeply, 'He's an adult, he'll be okay.'

...

It was quiet at Blue Base, deathly so.

Wash stayed at Red Base after three days; Sarge pretended he minded.

...

"They should've come back by now." Washington muttered one morning, staring out the window, as he usually did in the mornings. "They could've gotten killed out there."

"Calm down, Romeo." Grif replied, laying back in his chair at the table, feet propped up. "Sarge promised he'd yell if he saw them coming, just... I dunno, relax I guess, if that's even possible for you..."

"I can assure you, it is." Wash explained, turning away from the window, sighing deeply. "I just worry alot; 'Lina used to say that I'd get gray hair if I kept it up."

"Who the fuck is 'Lina?" Grif asked, sitting up, feet smacking the wooden floor with an audible 'thump'. "She one of your Creative Mode pals?"

Wash nodded, pushing his leftover breakfast to Grif, if only to insure the other would stay. "Yeah, she's the oldest out of us, except maybe Maine, but... we don't have proof? I dunno, it's complicated; Maine is a giant yet he might only be barely older than me and 'Lina is the oldest, that's all I know."

Grif hummed, munching on the bread and apple Wash had given him. "They seem nice; you talk about those two alot, but what about those other guys, what're they like?"

Wash shrugged, putting his feet up on the table, much like Grif had done. "Well, there are a few other guys... there's Connie, North, South, Wyoming, Florida, York... I think that's everyone. Wait, right, there's also 479er, but she's been traveling lately but pops by often enough."

"They seem cool." Grif stated.

"They're good people." Wash agreed, rocking his chair a bit, biting his lip whenever he wobbled a little too much. "Sure they're having a blast wherever they are..."

Grif nodded in agreement. "I'm sure they're looking for ya, they're just... late I guess, kinda like Sister. I mean, you remember that one time you told Sister that that 'Lina chick was your sis?"

"Ye- wait, how-"

"It's a sibling thing." Grif promised, waving the other man off quickly. "Well, if she's as over-protective as me or my sister, she's been busting her ass looking for ya, so be fucking patient."

Wash stared at Grif, then nodded, sighing to himself. "I still wish I knew how they were doing though, it's still kinda weird not knowing if they're okay or not."

"Well-" Grif was cut off, suddenly grinning as he stared behind Wash, out the window. "Dude... Wash, turn around."

"Why?" Wash asked, raising an eyebrow at Grif curiously. "What's behind me? Is it Simmons? Are you guys trying to prank me again?"

Grif shook his head, still smirking. "No way, just look!"

With a roll of his eyes, Wash looked behind himself, eyes widening as he saw Tucker on the other side of the window, grinning wide at the gray miner. Wash yelped as he fell out of his chair in an attempt to run to the window, flailing on the floor before standing, facing the window. Tucker put his hand on the window, Wash putting his over Tucker's, both laughing their asses off at the inside joke. Grif chuckled behind him, but Wash ignored the orange miner, instead, he broke the window, mentally noting to fix it later, and crawled out the small space, laughing as Tucker yanking him the rest of the way out, hugging the older man.

"Told you I'd be back." Tucker muttered, chuckling against Wash's neck. "I bet you were all depressed without me around."

"As if!" Wash yelled, smacking Tucker on the head, internally reminding himself to pay off the Reds somehow to keep quiet about his minor depression. "How was the quest?"

Tucker deflated a bit, groaning. "Boring as fuck!" He told Wash, shaking his head. "We hardly did anything but walk a million miles, Hell, I didn't even lose a life!"

"How is that a bad thing?" Wash asked, grabbing Tucker and leading him towards Blue Base. "Come on, you can tell me all about it."

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Next chapter will mostly be about how Tucker, Caboose, Crunchbite, Epsilon, and Sister's adventure went over! Thanks for reading!**

**~CabooseHeart.**


	5. Chapter 5

**Nether Worry**

**Part 5**

**Pairing: Agent Washington/Tucker, Caboose/Church, Grif/Simmons**

**Description: In which the Reds and Blues come across a lonely Creative Mode dweller, Sarge makes about ten times more Iron Golems than are strictly necessary, and where Tucker learns that Wash is indeed not a replacement for Church and that may or may not be a bad thing after all.**

**A/N: Would love if y'all refused, and I'm sorry that I forgot to update on Friday! Love ya! Please R&R!**

* * *

><p>Three miners, a cat, and an Endermen all trudged silently through the large Field biome, and by silently, we of course mean loudly. Crunchbite seemed to be rather busy explaining something to Sister, who in return tried to keep up in listening to his scrambled words that must've somehow been called a language in his culture, Caboose was chatting idly to himself about something involving how Simmons would be jealous of his 'Real Life' role playing game adventure, Tucker was hanging off in the back looking bored as all Hell, and Epsilon had his ears folded downwards as he trotted beside Caboose, looking to be ignoring the blue miner. Suddenly, Sister stopped, making everyone behind her catch up before she turned around, smiling.<p>

"Hey, so, Crunchbite's been telling me everything we might encounter. The legend's pretty old, but the details are pretty clear." Sister explained simply, nodding sideways at Crunchbite.

"Um, Miss Church's Sister?" Caboose asked, holding up his hand like a school student, brow furrowed in worry. "Will we be killing anybody on our adventure?"

Tucker gave Caboose an almost exasperated look. "Dude, this is the world of… whatever; there are always gonna be monsters to kill."

"Yes, but will we encounter a Warlock?" Caboose questioned, as if he were asking of God's whereabouts. "I do not have enough potions to fight one yet; we need to find more loot, and more dice."

Sister nodded, grinning at Caboose. "You got it, man!" She promised, giving him a thumbs up. "I promise you if we find any, you get first dibs!"

Caboose seemed pleased with that, giving Tucker another chance to speak. "So, why did we stop again? Are we finally here?"

Sister shook her head, pointing behind herself. "These are the Great Burning Plains." She explained, pulling out her map. "According to Crunchbite, we're supposed to fight some sorta monster here…"

"Burning Plains? They do not look on fire… only burnt." Caboose stated, giving the field a very unimpressed look.

Sister shrugged nonchalantly. "Eh, blame God, that's what I always say when shit doesn't make sense, like when Chickens look like Ducks."

"Wait, a monster?" Tucker asked, raising an eyebrow in confusion. "It's broad daylight; nothing can spawn in daylight… 'cept you, Crunch."

"It's a special kinda monster; regular ones aren't important enough in this to actually be the villain or whatever." Sister told them, stuffing her map away to pull out a strange soot colored skull. "This is a Wither Skull."

Tucker gave it an odd look, accepting it whenever Sister handed it to him. "What's a Wither Skull? It some sorta burned Skeleton?"

"Kinda," Sister explained, taking it back as she looked over it almost fondly. "The lure behind them is kinda sketchy-"

"-Sketchy like my last marriage, bow chicka bow wow!"

Sister laughed outright, shook her head, then continued on in her explanation. "Anyway, these Wither dudes are kinda… sketchy, like I mentioned. No one's really sure how they came around. Just think of them as that one dude at the frat party that nobody knows but doesn't have the heart to kick out."

Caboose seemed even more confused. "Ya know, maybe we do not have the full picture; maybe they are simply misunderstood creatures who only seek to find an end to their never ending torment by ripping away the lives of those around them, when in actuality they crave the love and affection they so rightly deserve… or they just showed up like flowers in a 12w36a update."

Everyone simply stared at Caboose, not knowing how to react. "… So anyway, we're gonna summon a Wither." Sister deadpanned.

"Wait, what!?" Tucker yelled, hands immediately clamping onto his helmet in fear. "We don't even know what it is!"

"Yeah, that's what makes it fun!" Sister explained, setting up a few strange sand-like blocks that Tucker didn't recognize, as well as three Wither skulls on it. "Better run, bitch!"

The party did not need to be told twice.

In a matter of seconds, a strange snake-like mob with purely white eyes appeared, flashing white as it began to recharge it's health. Tucker immediately went running, attempting to get as far away from that fucking monstrosity as he could, pulling out his sword as he ducked into a tiny trench. In a matter of minutes, loud explosions filled the air, followed by a screaming Caboose and a hissing Epsilon crashing into the trench beside Tucker, eyes wide and probably scarred for life. The darker man whimpered, mentally telling himself to get Sister back for this one.

"Oh, yeah, Crunchbite says it can't get hurt from Lava!" Sister suddenly shouted, making another explosion follow. "Hey, watch it, asshole!"

In a rare moment of courage (Maybe only caused because Tucker knew Sister only had a Golden Hoe for a weapon), Tucker flipped out of the trench, eyes wide as he got a much better look at the creature. It was now tinted a strangely bluer color, eyes still terrifyingly white, and it immediately whooshed around, as if staring into Tucker's soul. The man froze, adrenaline not yet taking over his limbs, and he almost considered running. He suddenly held his ground, angling his feet to dodge when ready as he prepared his sword, glaring heatedly at the Wither. It opened it's mouth, a blue skull in it slowly forming; time seemed to slow down, Tucker planning his next attack carefully.

"Yo, bitch!" Tucker shouted, just as the Wither blasted the Wither Skull at him. "Batter up!"

The teal miner swung the sword just right, back-firing the skull to bounce off his sword and smash straight into the Wither, causing a mind numbing explosion. Tucker was tossed away, his time briefly flying through the air reminding him of the night he 'met' Wash (More like saw him unconscious) before landing roughly a few feet away. The man groaned loudly, much like a Zombie, and squirmed on the ground, his head killing him before a much worse pain took over and shook his body violently. Sister, Crunchbite, Epsilon, and Caboose soon towered above him, their voices muted as they talked, mouths moving but nothing registering to the downed miner,

Just before Tucker passed out, he could've sworn someone had said something about 'Catching Wither', but he couldn't be sure.

* * *

><p>"Holy shit, is he gonna die?"<p>

"Screeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!"

"Oh, so is he gonna be 'Undead'? That would be awesome!"

"Scree scree scree!"

"Ugh, you are just no fun, man! I swear, we gotta get you capital 'L' laid! I mean, maybe it'll force that fucking pole outta your ass, ya know?"

"Scree scree scree scree!"

"Oh, well, sorry then, didn't know that was so offensive to ya… wait, I think he's waking up!"

Tucker opened his eyes with a slight hiss, regretting it almost immediately, everything still a blurry mass of pain tingling like ice sickles through his nervous system. "Oh… what happened?" He moaned out, squinting at Sister. "Am I dead? 'Cus I always wanted to bone an angel, bow chicka-"

"Tucker!" Caboose shouted, suddenly way too close into his line of vision. "You are not dead, that is a relief, I was worried I would have to go home but you would not be there… it would be sad."

"Naw, I'm fine, man." Tucker mumbled, trying to sit up, giving up halfway and going limp on the ground. "Fuck it, I'm not fine, you should be worried."

Sister nodded in agreement, exchanging a few garbled whispers with Crunchbite. "You're not gonna die… we think."

"You think!?" Tucker questioned, jolting up at once, eyes wide, before collapsing again, seeing as Epsilon had decided to plop down heavily on his probably cracked ribs. "What did that thing do to me?"

"Calm down, you only caught Wither." Sister explained, shrugging it off. "The most it'll do is give you heart failure, destroy your lungs, ruin your social life, and terminate your sex appeal."

"What's the least it can do?" Tucker begged to know.

Sister shrugged, looking not nearly as concerned as she should. "I dunno, brain damage?"

"Great." Tucker muttered, glaring at the sky as he crossed his arms, ignoring the way Crunchbite glared at him for looking him in the eyes. "Shut up, you're the one who dragged me into this shit."

Caboose suddenly scooped Tucker up, tossing him onto his back. "I will carry you to your destiny, Tucker! You can count on me… I have always wanted to be a pony, or, a cowboy."

Tucker squirmed, but to no avail. "Put me down, dumbass!" He ordered, but Caboose ignored him, following Crunchbite and Sister with a smile.

Epsilon almost grinned at Tucker as he scuttled behind his master, an evil glint in his eyes. "Fuck you, Epsilon." Tucker muttered, sighing before passing out awhile later.

* * *

><p>"Kay, so, Crunchbite says it's okay to rest here." Sister announced hours later, taking a seat in the grassy clearing of the forest. "We should get there by tomorrow or the day after."<p>

"Awesome," Tucker muttered sarcastically, collapsing on the ground after Caboose released his hold on him. "Can't wait to see what else wants to pound me in the ass-"

"Hey chicka bump bump!" Caboose interrupted excitedly. "Yes, now I am the lady killer of the party… I hope I do not lose experience for changing my class."

"Shut the fuck up, Caboose." Tucker ordered, not at all fazed that he was sprawled out face first in the dirt. "Wake me if you need me, bitches." With that, he was out cold.

"Um, miss Sister?" Caboose asked, holding up his hand in question like he had done weeks ago. "Will Tucker die?"

Sister shrugged in response. "I dunno, but I think that Wither shit wore off on him a few days ago."

Caboose shook his head. "No, I do not mean the icky Zombie disease, I want to know if Tucker shall die or not."

"Dude, I'm still not sure on the details; we're getting way farther in our quest than those before us according to Crunchy over here." Sister explained, pointing her thumb towards where Crunchbite was looming suspiciously over Tucker.

"Mr. Friendermen?" Caboose called out, giving Crunchbite a very worried look. "Why are you looking at Tucker all weird?"

Sister, seeming to notice this, swung around, raising an eyebrow at Crunchbite. "Dude, you okay, man? You're kinda… breathing all heavy and shit."

Crunchbite didn't break eye-contact with Tucker's unconscious form for a few minutes before looking up, blinking very slowly, before teleporting away, screeching something to Kai. "Alright, man… that was fucking weird; Crunchbite is usually such a chill dude." Sister explained, looking worried as she faced the campfire she had just made. "I think he's not telling me something, but I'm not sure what it is…"

Caboose nodded, standing up to plop down beside Sister, hugging her close. "I shall tell you all of the important things that I know… you do not need to be sad, Church's Sister."

Sister chuckled, leaning into Caboose's hold on her person. "That's why I love you, Caboose. You're either a big sweetie who always tells the truth, or you just don't understand what it is we're talking about… guess that's why we get along so well."

"You are very smart, Sister." Caboose stated, as if this were a very important and well-known fact. "You are not dumb."

"Thanks," Sister muttered back, closing her eyes heavily as she leaned on Caboose, falling asleep before Crunchbite could pop back up.

Minutes after Caboose and Sister had fallen asleep, Crunchbite popped back to the camp, setting down a melon block before turning to Tucker, seeing that his moment of opportunity was in his grasp. Double checking to make sure Sister and Caboose were fast asleep, Crunchbite loomed over Tucker, looking the miner over with steady eyes.

It would be a long night for Crunchbite.

* * *

><p>The next morning, Tucker groaned awake. The first thing he realized was how damn cold it was. He sat up, whimpering slightly as a wave of aches exploded from his nether regions. He shook himself violently, standing up on legs that felt like jelly, before looking over the campsite carefully. Sister, Caboose, and Epsilon were curled up beside the fire, a blanket having been wrapped securely around them all, which Tucker figured was Crunchbite's handy work; he did seem to have a soft spot for the yellow miner. Speaking of Crunchbite, he was wide awake and sitting in front of the campfire, which had gone out hours ago, messing with a small rose he had found.<p>

"Yo," Tucker greeted, plopping down beside Crunchbite, biting his lip as another ache echoed through his nervous system. "Fuck, I haven't been this sore since that bachelorette party in that snow biome. Bow chicka bow wow."

Crunchbite didn't look impressed, turning to stare at Tucker, face neutral.

"Come on, man. These are the jokes." Tucker deadpanned, pouting at the ground. "Where were you last night?"

Crunchbite didn't answer, teleporting to stand over Caboose and Sister, shaking them awake. "Fine, whatever, forget I asked." Tucker muttered, smiling however as his teammates finally stood up.

The two miners shook off their remaining fatigue, Sister giving Tucker a once over. "Dude, you look like a fucking wreck." She pointed out, eyes wide. "You okay?"

"Just sore." Tucker explained. "But I mean, if your mom can handle it, then so can I, bow chicka bow wow."

"Whatever," Sister replied, smiling wide as she tossed her backpack back on, nodding towards one end of the clearing. "Come on, let's go!"

Hours passed in slow motion it seemed as the party trudged on, all just wanting this quest to end, some more than others. Tucker hanged back again in the group, Epsilon chilling out on his shoulder somewhat peacefully. Caboose was taking the lead, grinning and singing something way off tune as their traveling song, claiming that it was a spell he was using to help time go faster as they traveled. Tucker didn't believe a word of it, but, whatever, he would let Caboose have his fun for as long as he wanted. Sister and Crunchbite were around the middle, but closer to Tucker in distance, and, like they had been for days, were speaking in a language Sister insisted to Tucker was 'Endessee'.

It was interesting enough; maybe Sister would teach him some time.

"Stop!" Sister suddenly screamed in very real English at a very loud volume. "We got trouble soon!"

Tucker rolled his eyes, catching up to the rest of his party. "What the fuck is it now? If it's another Wither, I'm gonna kill myself so I can just go home."

Sister shook her head, signaling for everyone to get down, Crunchbite whispering some sorta explanation to her for why. "Get down. Sorry, he just wants a moment to chill before the quest fails and we all die…" Crunchbite glared full force at Sister. "Oh, uh, sorry, wasn't supposed to translate that last bit… um, stick to the plan, everyone is gonna be just fine!"

"Um, what was the plan again?" Caboose asked.

"It's simply; don't die while we wait for Tucker to basically be Jesus and light the holy grail… or in this case, slash a keyhole with his magical key sword."

"It's a key!?" Tucker questioned, looking at the sword as if it had disgraced his entire family. "But… I found it in a hole once with Tex…"

"Really? I've never found anything that badass in a hole, and I've fucked just about every hole you can think of!" Sister explained, eyes wide.

"Yeah… wait, what?" Tucker asked, but stopped as he heard a hiss nearby. "Creepers." He whispered in a startled tone, getting lower on the ground in fear. "Motherfuck."

Sister nodded, suddenly jumping up. "Charge!" She shouted, bursting over the hill, where a large village with nothing but Creepers living in it resided. "Go get 'em, Tuck!"

Tucker screeched, much like an Endermen, and ran wildly towards… well, Sister seemed like the safest option, seeing as he had zero idea where this keyhole or whatever was. He dodged Creepers with amazing skill as he rushed them, not bothering to pick a fight; he'd be dead in seconds if he risked such a war. The teal miner finally managed to find Kai, who had ducked into a large chasm under the village, where a button laid just waiting to be pushed, a long line of redstone trailing from the button towards the darkness of the caverns. Sister nodded proudly at Tucker as he joined her.

"Tucker, glad to see ya made it!" Sister greeted, nodding towards the button once more. "Kay, so here's the mission; just slash that button with your blade and we can go home."

"Wait, that's it? That's what we've been traveling for, like, half a month for!? To push a fucking button with a sword!?" Tucker screamed, glaring at the terrible button. "No one could wait for something to just step on it?"

"Well, only the sword can turn it on." Sister explained, smiling at Tucker hopefully. "Come on, just push it and we'll go."

Tucker sighed, rolling his eyes before tiptoeing over to the button, slashing it and jumping back upon contact. "There. Happy?"

A loud screech soon filled the air, Crunchbite teleporting into the cavern and throwing Sister and Tucker back, taking the strange sand-colored block from a pedestal that had risen from the button pushing, and disappeared in a puff of purple light, brighter and more violent sounding than an Endermen's usual teleporting sound. Caboose suddenly hopped into the cavern, Epsilon smiling proudly at the group as it's tail swished behind Caboose's head, coming to wrap itself gently around the blue miner's neck.

"Hello!" Caboose greeted at once, waving at his teammates. "The Creepers all went away… Church made them scared. Hey, where is Crunchbite?"

Tucker stared at Caboose before shaking his head, eyes distraught. Meanwhile, Sister started running around the caverns, frantically searching. "Crunchbite! Crunchbite!" She called out, looking close to tears. "Come on, man! This isn't funny anymore!"

Caboose looked away as well, unable to stare as Sister continued searching wildly for something that wasn't even there. "Come on, Crunch! We… we were gonna go on more adventures… we… we were gonna help you find a girlfriend…" She stared at the ground, coughing in an attempt to keep the tears from rolling down her cheeks. "You were my best friend…"

No one said a word for a very long time after that, but all agreed on one thing-

Crunchbite was gone; wherever he was, it wasn't on Earth, and whether they tried to ignore it or not…

It hurt like Hell.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Sad ending to this chapter, but the next one has Freelancers so it should be happier than this (Bet that's the first time the Freelancers have been happier than the BGC in any story). Thanks for reading! Please R&R!  
><strong>

**~CabooseHeart.**


	6. Chapter 6

**Nether Worry**

**Part 6**

**Pairing: Agent Washington/Tucker, Caboose/Church, Grif/Simmons**

**Description: In which the Reds and Blues come across a lonely Creative Mode dweller, Sarge makes about ten times more Iron Golems than are strictly necessary, and where Tucker learns that Wash is indeed not a replacement for Church and that may or may not be a bad thing after all.**

**A/N: I ACTUALLY DID ON TIME FOR ONCE!**

* * *

><p>"Whelp, we're lost as fuck." York stated matter-of-factly, looking around the large and expansive forest carefully. "I can't find him anywhere."<p>

"That 'cus he wouldn't be sleeping right in the open, fucknut." South explained, squinting into the brush with distaste. "I'm gonna kill the fucker who gave Wash the bright idea to turn his Creative off."

"Yeah… what a wanker…" Wyoming muttered, sweating nervously from the back of the group. "Can't think of who would do such a thing…"

"Alright guys, huddle up!" Carolina yelled from the top of a dirt tower she had made. "I got an important announcement to make."

"Did you find Wash, are we gonna beat the shit outta him with Wooden Swords?" Connie asked, looking eager to find her comrade. "I'm gonna kill that fucker whenever I find him…"

"Calm down there, champ," North instructed, rubbing Connie's back in soothing circles. "We're all upset with him, but we don't need to kill him."

Connie, along with everyone else, didn't seem to agree. "Alright, so I think I know where Wash might actually be." Carolina explained, yanking out her map, ignoring the unconvinced looks. "I got word from a villager that they know of a village way down south called Clayville," She tucked the map away, looking hopeful. "If we're lucky, he'll be there, if we're not… we'll just have to keep looking."

Maine growled something intangible to most, but Carolina was capable of getting the gist of it. "Hey, I get it, things are kinda sucky since we left Creative to find him-"

"-I died because North was being a donkey ass!" South interrupted.

"Yes, we know, South." Carolina said, shaking her head as she rubbed at her temple, internally counting to ten.

"We also know you didn't set your map coordinates." North added, earning a hard slap to the forehead via South, and a chuckle via York.

"Everybody, shut the fuck up!" Carolina ordered, growling as Maine seemed to grumble out a tiny chuckle-like reaction to her outburst. "Look, we got a lead, it's better than nothing, right?"

Connie nodded, smiling up at Carolina as she tossed one of her knives offhandedly to herself. "Right. And if we stay together, and work as a team, we'll find Wash in no time."

York grinned, nodding his own agreement. "Then we'll go home, turn back on our Creative, and pretend none of this shit ever happened."

"But… we'll get that Pigs Fly achievement first…" Carolina stated, staring at the ground, refusing eye-contact.

"Why the shit would we do that!? I'm pretty sure Wash's crappy reenactment of Dumbo taught us it was a shit idea." South explained, earning a few 'yeps' and nods as a result.

"Look, I'm not about to be outdone by Wash." Carolina explained, sighing as she walked towards where the villager had pointed earlier. "Come on, let's just go find that little dumbass before he gets himself killed off."

* * *

><p>"Is this supposed to be a High Hills biome or whatever?"<p>

"Yeah, Carolina. Pretty sure the giant fuck-off hills explain that."

"Shut up, South."

The Freelancers all walked through the hills biome carefully as night loomed awake, it's starry night rising at an explicable rate. All of them were worn out, even Carolina, who was barely keeping awake as it was. Maine was carrying a resting Connie on his back, York was being more or less dragged by the Dakota Twins, and Wyoming was trudging in the back by his lonesome. Seeing Wyoming acting so distant reminded Carolina loosely of when Florida was around, back when none of them had even heard of Survival Mode and had lived pretty decent lives, working with a man named The Director who had them play fun games he called 'Let's Plays'. They were all in good fun, but lately… Carolina would rather not think about it.

They had, however, all left without much warning after Washington got hurt, leaving a sign that simply read 'Be back soon, gotta regroup'. Carolina had hoped that the Director would think they were going after Florida, which was acceptable, after all, everyone was wondering where the old coot had hobbled off to, whether it be somewhere far away into the lands of Creative, into the darkened Nether, or even past the mountains to Survival. As Carolina finally led them over a second hill, a loud howl broke through the air, reminding the aqua armored leader that night was upon them and shelter was now more necessary than ever. She stopped, signaling for the rest of her team to follow her lead.

"We'll rest here tonight." Carolina announced, yawning as she plopped down on the ground, scrubbing the sweat off her forehead. "We'll keep it up in the morning…"

Everyone groaned both in relief at the rest stop and in agony at the thought of more traveling, but they knew it was necessary. "Got it, boss." Connie mumbled, waking up as Maine sat down, scooting away to stand up and stretch. "I'll get some food for us before Maine tries to eat anybody."

York gave Connie a worried look. "You sure, man?" He asked, silently wishing they'd brought their AI pets along. "It's the dead of night, and I'm not sure it's a good idea to split off."

Connie chuckled, patting York on the head as she walked off. "Don't worry, York. I can take plenty care of myself. I'm a big girl." As if to prove her point, she slashed one of the biome's rare oak trees in half with her axe, whistling as she disappeared into the night.

South whistled loudly. "Hot damn." She whispered, smirking at Connie's disappearing person.

"Keep it in your pants." North ordered, in a way only he as her brother could possibly get away with.

"Don't tell me what to do." South grumbled, punching North in the arm, earning a mild swat to the head via North.

"Play nice, children." Wyoming ordered, before things could get ugly and turn into a full on sibling fight; Notch only knew how badly that would end for them. "Just go on off to bed."

South rolled her eyes, but nonetheless laid down on the cool grassy ground, slashing any weeds nearby that dared to try and spread pollen or grass blades into her eyes. "Whatever, dad."

"Don't call me that. I'm not your pop." Wyoming muttered, but kept to himself, pulling out his bow, re-fastening the draw string over and over in a monotonous motion used to pass the time.

"Can you all hush while I try to actually start a damn fire?" Carolina asked, working with Maine to try and start the flame, improvising flint by slashing two swords against each other in quick, rushed motions. "This is hard enough as it is."

York chuckled, earning a mild glare from Carolina, to which he winked back at her. "Anything you need me to do, 'Lina?"

"Why don't you jump off a bridge and shut the fuck up?" South suggested, having secretly yet gently stolen a teddy bear from Wyoming's sleeping form, cuddling the teddy against her chest. "It would do us all some good."

Maine growled something at South, thankfully, though, it was lost to her ears, seeing as at that moment she'd passed out. "Ignore her, she's just tired." Carolina reminded him. "Just focus, we need fire or we're dead meat out here."

The two were both, in their own ways, elegant in the way they fought, though the hits were never meant for a target other than the other miner's sword. Where Maine was all brute force, sword swinging to do nothing more than damage and destroy, Carolina was more planned in her movements, all quick, sharp, and meant to effect the other. Sparks came quickly thanks to this, but, unfortunately, it was made clear that swords would not get the job done. With defeated sighs, Carolina put away her sword, along with Maine, both taking seats opposite each other around the failed campfire. Seeing his chance, York squeezed in beside Carolina, wrapping an arm around her.

"I think it was an awesome idea, 'Lina!" York assured her, rubbing the woman's back in a soothing motion. "Don't you worry, we'll get a fire started sooner or later."

"Monsters have spawned by now, York." Carolina reminded him, looking angry once more, mild fury apparent in her emerald eyes. "If we don't get a fire started soon, we'll have Creepers and Skeletons galore on our asses."

"Um… why isn't Connie back yet?" North finally asked after a few minutes, looking around with worry filled eyes. "Shouldn't she've come back by now?"

As if on cue, a loud screech broke through the air. "Connie!" South screamed, standing at the ready, sword drawn, awake without question. "I'm coming!"

The twin took off into the darkness, disappearing from sight. "South, stop!" North shouted, ready to go after his twin sister, but stopped, looking around desperately. "South?"

Said twin returned exactly three seconds later, Connie over one shoulder, a knocked out unidentified miner over the other. She gave them a wide eyed look, zooming right by them, yelling something intangible other than the phrase 'fuck' being used several times in her scrambled warning. The Freelancers froze, looking warily at each other as they attempted to deduce what exactly was going on. South was not one to run from a fight, they reasoned. So why would South of all people run from something that could possibly have injured Connie and some stranger?

They didn't have long to wonder.

* * *

><p>"Shit!" York screamed, running like all Hell was loose away from the rampaging Spiders, boots clamping against the muddy, uneven earth.<p>

North, unsurprisingly, was far faster than York, charging away from the twenty something Spiders. "Holy crap, run!" He advised, shooting arrows at any Spiders who got too close for comfort.

"Everyone, keep calm and try to outrun them! Try to make it to the next town!" Carolina ordered professionally, but even the others could see how scared she was. "Try to split up; they can't catch us all! Wyoming and York, you get climbing on those hills east of here. North, you catch up with South and Connie and try to make it to the next village. Maine, you're with me; we'll try to swim our way to an island west of here. We'll all meet up in the desert at daybreak. Go!"

"Aw, bullocks." Wyoming muttered, sadly following York as the brunette took off for the hills not too far off, barely keeping up with the younger man.

Maine grunted something before running towards Carolina, following her to a river nearby. As they hopped in, a few Spiders followed, just as a few had followed York and Wyoming, and tried to swim after them. Now, not many people knew this, but Carolina was, and still is, a pretty pathetic swimmer (Her mom is too though). The red head tried to keep up, really, she did, but she was rather short, and the moon being up made the tide that much worse. Without a word, Maine scooped Carolina clean out of the water, plopping her onto his back to shoot arrows at the incoming Spiders while he focused on swimming to the island. One after the other, Spiders died, but that in no way stopped Maine from continuing for the far off shoreline.

North, with a deep breath, started after South, his lungs burning like Hell fire as he followed. If there was one thing other than quick wittiness that South outdid North in, it was speed. She'd always been faster, not above leaving North in the dust, but this time, North felt no need to blame her. In this world, it's every man for himself, it was actually only recently that miners had begun sticking together, forming villages and groups to stray away from danger. Rumor had it that the death rates had dropped dramatically, whether from less children being unsupervised and wandering off to get eaten, or less miners getting ripped apart by monsters. No one knew which was more successful.

As the night grew longer, the Spiders disappeared, but the miners stayed put until daybreak.

* * *

><p>"Maine, wake up."<p>

The behemoth of a miner awoke with a muted growl, rolling over in an attempt to ignore Carolina and, for the millionth time, remind her he was not interested whatsoever in her morning training sessions. However, Carolina was persistent, and like she'd seen Connie do several times, she climbed on top of Maine, and with a deep breath, jumped as hard as she could on his stomach. The miner acted before he replied. Maine grabbed Carolina with an amount of skill that reminded Carolina that Maine had, according to Wash's explanation, grown up mostly on his own and was used to attacking before letting himself wake up. The red head was held roughly upside-down, the hold on her thin ankle hurting and aching as Maine glared at her, a loose grumble leaving his throat.

"I hope that's your stomach, buddy." Carolina replied, a loose smile on her charming face, pretending her life hadn't just flashed before her eyes when Maine had grabbed her. "How 'bout putting me down now, huh?"

Maine, with just a hint of remaining anger and adrenaline, set his leader down gently, ruffling her fiery hair with a soft huff. "Yeah, got it, I'll try to not do it again, bud. But hey, we really need to get going."

Maine, blinking, looked around the crudely made campsite with wide eyes, before he nodded, remembering the adventure more clearly now that he was more awake. "See? We gotta go before the guys start worrying themselves sick." Carolina explained further.

With a nod, Maine and Carolina started walking to the shore of the tiny island they had taken shelter on, looking over towards where the opposite continent lied. Not saying a thing, Maine hoisted Carolina onto his back, hopping into the water. The giant swam like an incoming shark, slick and skilled in it's practiced and majestic art. The red head on said giant's back huffed to herself before deciding Maine had done enough protecting of her person for one night, and hopped into the water herself, daring to swim to shore without Maine's aid. She could swim, not very well, but she was no damsel in distress, and she was determined to prove that to Maine. Maine rolled his sharp grey eyes, restraining the need to hoist Carolina right back onto his back, knowing full well how she'd just jump right back into the salty blue of the ocean.

"I'm fine, Maine. Stop giving me that look." Carolina ordered, more or less dog-paddling her through, dragging a tad behind her friend, but still staying above water, if only barely. "I said stop it."

"Hm." Maine managed to sound out, despite the damage on his vocal-cords, purposefully hanging back in-case Carolina might need his help.

"You're such a dad." Carolina muttered, a hard scowl on her face when Maine held out his arm to her, just as they reached shallower water. "I like the water, Maine. It's helping me wake up more, and I don't need any help."

Maine decided, in that moment, to quit trying to help the red head unless she desperately needed it. After all, she was an adult. She could take care of herself.

* * *

><p>"Wake up."<p>

"Mm."

"Wake up, York."

"Go away…"

"For the love of- wake up, you bloody wanker!"

York awoke with a loud yelp as Wyoming smacked his rear with an arrow, thankfully not the sharp flint tip, but only giving him a harsh smack to get him up and moving. Instead, the brunet twisted on the dirt ridden ground, briefly reacting on instinct and grabbing his sword, slashing outward. Wyoming dodged with a pristine expertise, sidestepping as York tucked into a roll, standing and swinging again, this time stronger and more planned. Wyoming, again, dodged, if only barely, drawing his bow and firing an arrow in front of York's feet. The lock-pick stopped dead in his tracks, breathing hard and fast as he blinked several times, regaining what was left of his fatigue and tossing it away, remembering where he was and why.

"Wyoming?" York asked, coughing as his throat burned with his body's revenge, punishing the man for his foolish reaction.

"The one and only, mate." Wyoming replied, a small smirk glued under his mustache. "That wake you up enough, or do I need to smack you again?"

York glared a bit at Wyoming, huffing as he turned away (Not completely, couldn't give the cracker another chance), putting his sword away and putting his blanket in his backpack. "Thanks alot, asshole. Ya know, most people just nudge somebody's shoulder to wake them up."

"I'm aware," Wyoming explained, rolling his dark eyes. "Not my fault you're such a deep sleeper, chap. Should get that checked out sooner or later."

"Shut up," York ordered, a bit of anger still remaining as a dull ache in his skull, either that or the wake up call had been more effecting than anyone would've liked. "Let's go, we need to meet up in that village before someone gets hurt."

Wyoming nodded in confirmation, throwing his satchel over his thin shoulder, taking a puff of his cigarette, tossing York's spare lighter at said brunet. "Come along then, while it's still daylight."

York took his lighter back with a very audible huff, making a very childish face at Wyoming once the Brit turned his back. When Wyoming swung around, a wide smirk on his face, York ceased his face-making. Instead, the brunet busted past Wyoming like a stray lightning bolt, blasting by and smacking the Brit upside the head, at the same time stealing the older man's cigarette, taking a deep puff of it and stomping it out before racing down the hill. With an almost primal growl, Wyoming was after York, black hair a bit of an unruly mess as he took off after the childish party animal. With that, the sun began to rise over the horizon, but it went unnoticed as a British man chased after what he considered to be an inappropriate American.

* * *

><p>"You okay, Connie?"<p>

The short woman yawned awake, blinking her eyes open at South curiously as the blonde stood tall over her, a rare and almost terrifying look of worry on her face, her brow creased with the emotion. Connie, on instinct, nodded at South, having registered the question after a few more seconds of being conscious. South sighed with relief, returning back to her cocky and sometimes inappropriate nature faster than a heartbeat to a newborn, smirking down at the girl. Looking around, Connie quickly realized she was in the middle of a desert, just as the sun was coming up. There were no monsters to be seen, only South, standing between Connie and a powerful, roaring fire.

The fire complimented South's nature like salt to water, the flame cursing and flaring like South's tongue on any day of the week, it's burning glow like South's strong and emotional personality, it's warmth hidden by it's dangerous licks, just like South's kindness, hidden behind walls and fortresses of anger and redemption. After a moment, Connie noticed another miner nearby, a young man without any armor whatsoever, and the memories rushed back like a wildfire, consuming and uncontrollable. Connie remembered meeting him, just a poor, failing village doctor named Frank, having been kicked out of his village for being such a terrible doctor, having lost seven of his nine patients after a wild horde of Zombie's had attacked the village.

He and Connie had crossed paths while Connie was out gathering food, and she had nearly killed the poor kid, but he had immediately fallen back to screeching whenever Connie had tried at stabbing him, thinking him to be a Zombie. After a somewhat awkward conversation, Connie had found out Frank's name, offering to take him back to her camp and help him out, but Spiders had attacked them out of nowhere, and she had been knocked out while trying to fight them back. After that, she had no clue what had happened, but she and Frank weren't dead, so she supposed that was a pretty good sign.

"What happened?" Connie figured she may as well ask South, after all, she looked to have been her savior.

"Long story short, a shitload of Spiders tried to more or less ram your rectum, so this nerd saved your sorry ass and dragged you both into a shitty tree. Would've died if I hadn't gone looking for ya, Connie." South explained loosely, waving Connie off whenever the brunet tried to thank her. "Don't worry 'bout it, kid. All in a day's work."

"Mm." Both South and Connie looked over, watching as Frank sat up, yawning loudly as he came to. At once, he froze, eyes wide as he stared at South. "Oh… oh no… w-who are y-you?" He begged, looking ready to scream.

Connie, thankfully, stepped in before South could quite possibly scare the poor medic with her rather blunt personality. People like South took getting used to after all. "This is South," She explained, smiling comfortingly at Frank. "She's a friend."

Frank looked thankful, taking deep breaths as he finally recovered, nodding with his eyes closed, trying to fully calm himself down. "Thank God… I thought we were goners for sure, after you got hurt. I'm not very strong, so, I tried to drag you into a tree… God, I'm so glad you're not dead. It seems like everyone I ever meet dies or runs away from me."

South stared at Connie, eyes wide, giving her an 'Explain this' look. "He's a doctor from an old village a few miles out from where I met him… well, used to be a doctor. He got kicked out."

"You suck that bad, Doc?" South asked, laughing a bit at Frank. "That's pretty fucking hard, man. You must've been the worst doctor ever."

"My name isn't Doc." Frank insisted, ignoring South's insult. It seemed to Connie like he was used to them by now. "It's Frank."

"Yeah, well, that name is for bitches and old dudes," South stated matter-of-factly, nodding at the man. "From this day onward, your name is Doc."

"Well…" Frank looked suspicious, but nonetheless, he didn't look willing to put up a fight about it. "Alright, but I don't think it'll stick."

**[Frank "Doc" DuFresne - Not-Professional Medical Assistant]**

"Oh, trust me, it'll stick." South promised, grinning like a bobcat before looking at Connie, that worry entering her electric eyes with a tiny spark, lasting long enough for a simple question. "You still doing okay, Connie?"

Connie nodded, allowing South to help her to her feet. "Alright, then," South muttered, complying with the look in Connie's own eyes to relax. "Come on, let's get outta here and find the gang."

Doc, for a moment, looked terrified out of his mind again. "Wait! Y-You're not just gonna leave me out here, are you!?" He asked, shaking as he held up his medical backpack. "I can perform medical procedures, and that's better than having nothing, right? Come on, please don't leave me out here alone!"

"Hm, I dunno…" South said, the smile on her face trying to tease, while on the inside Connie knew South was just dicking around. "Think we should keep him, Connie?"

"I'm not sure, South," Connie admitted, entering the game as well, her own teasing grin on her face. "Not sure how much he can really help us out…"

Doc, getting desperate, grabbed Connie by her shoulders, shaking her once. "You wouldn't leave me, right Connie? I mean, I think we bonded in those woods, and…" He suddenly looked way more confident, even smirking. "And you owe me! I saved your life, now you gotta return the favor!"

"I thought me saving your sorry ass was the favor," South said, raising an eyebrow. "I mean, if you want, I could always take you back…"

"Don't!" Doc begged, his confidence wilting away in mere minutes of forming. "I'll do anything, I swear! Um… I have a friend, a guy named Franklin- I know, similar name- but he lives in some canyon! He writes to me alot! Look, he's super nice! He'll help ya out, and you can just leave me with him!"

That seemed to interest Connie. "Really now?" A sudden thought entered the brunet's mind, and she paused, looking hopefully at Doc. "Hey… since this Franklin guy writes to you… has he told you about stuff he's seen? Like, any strange miners?"

Doc nodded, smiling as he seemed to have gotten South and Connie's protection. "Oh yeah," He exclaimed, waving his hand as he spoke, something both woman assumed he associated with his Franklin friend. "He talks all about the other guys he's with! There's Caboose, Tucker, Church, Sarge, Grif, Simmons, and Wash!"

South and Connie stopped, exchanging a look, which got Doc worried. "Wait! Did I offend you guys? I'm sorry, please don't- hey, where are we going?" Before he knew it, Doc was begging dragged towards an incoming group of Freelancers by Connie and South.

As the other Freelancers arrived, they all looked each other over, until all eyes landed on a disheveled North Dakota. The male of the twins was breathing hard, doubled over, hands pressed against his knees, having ran to catch up as soon as he'd seen everyone else coming on time. York and Wyoming still looked irritated at each other, but all seemed to be temporarily forgotten as York ran over to Carolina, hugging her close and kissing her temple, the two exchanging a few brief words before separating. Maine looked fine, his arms crossed as he gave Doc the stink eye, who gulped and hid behind Connie, making the giant chuckle lightly, amused by the newcomer's timidness.

"So, is everyone okay?" Carolina asked, and once everyone nodded, she breathed a sigh of relief. "Good. Now th-"

"Carolina," It was South who spoke, voice hot like iron, just as strong to boot, her glare fixated on the red head with overwhelming intensity.

"What is it, South?" Carolina asked, noticing how excited Connie suddenly looked, her smile wide and apparent, bright like the morning sunshine over a salt ridden sea.

"We know where Wash is."

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Alright alright alright! There we go, and I'll have the next chapter up next Friday, so look out! Please R&R, I'd super duper appreciate it!  
><strong>

**~CabooseHeart.  
><strong>


	7. Chapter 7

**Nether Worry**

**Part 7**

**Pairing: Agent Washington/Tucker, Caboose/Church, Grif/Simmons**

**Description: In which the Reds and Blues come across a lonely Creative Mode dweller, Sarge makes about ten times more Iron Golems than are strictly necessary, and where Tucker learns that Wash is indeed not a replacement for Church and that may or may not be a bad thing after all.**

**A/N: Sorry it's late! Please R&R!**

* * *

><p>The time was somewhere around five AM when Washington was roused awake by Tucker's moans, certainly not ones he would've liked… had he seriously thought that, at a time like this? The other miner, the one who had moaned, was writhing on his bed in agony, groaning and aching from an unknown sickness or wound. Wash sat up, his brow furrowing as he looked over Tucker curiously, watching the poor miner whine as he clutched his belly, which, Wash had noticed, was much bigger since Tucker had returned a week prior. He had played it off as Tucker overeating, having after all been mostly starved during his adventure, but the miner had no idea if such a thing was true.<p>

The grey miner pulled himself out of bed, coming to stand over Tucker, placing his hand over the younger man's forehead, feeling great warmth immediately smother his once ice cold hand. Tucker whimpered again, trying to roll over, only to have Wash roll him back onto his back, running his hand across Tucker's forehead again in a comforting manner. Behind him, Caboose woke up, coming to stand beside Wash in his pajamas, Epsilon held to his chest in his arms. He gave Tucker a long, worried stare, bright blues gleaming as he looked over Tucker's slightly bloated belly. The blue looked ready to reach out and pat Tucker, but Wash grabbed Caboose's incoming fingers, shaking his head no.

"What is wrong with Tucker, Washingtub?" Caboose asked curiously, blinking as Tucker forced his pillow over his aching head.

"I'm not really sure, Caboose. I'm no doctor, and I've never really had to deal with sickness in Creative Mode." Washington admitted to the younger blue, shaking his head as somebody knocked on the door. "Fuck. Caboose, you watch Tucker and keep him in bed. Tucker, stay put, for the love of God."

As soon as Wash opened the door, Grif, Simmons, Sarge, and Donut flooded in, Lopez following behind, stopping to bark at Epsilon, who growled at the wolf angrily. "What the fuck are you guys doing here?" Wash asked, looking them over. "We're not due for a visit until Friday night for Monster hunting."

"We heard a rucuss and needed ta give 'er a check," Sarge explained, giving Wash a small nod. "Ya know how it goes."

"Yeah," Grif added, looking sleepy and irritated. "And when shit gets loud, it's usually 'cus of you Blues."

Washington sighed, shaking his head, but made no move to kick the Reds out. "Tucker is sick," He explained, motioning towards Tucker's hurting form. "We're not sure what's wrong with him."

Sarge hovered over Tucker, looking the poor man over, nodding to himself as he came to an answer. "I think I know what's been happenin'," He stated, smirking at Washington. "Either A; Tucker has finally conformed to being a Red, but has been disowned like the Blue heretic he is by the Red God himself. Or B; he's gonna be a mommy."

"Uh…" Simmons had no words that he could really put together to explain his amazement. "Sarge… what the fuck?"

"What!?" Sister shouted, awake and loud as she shot up out of her bed, having been out cold seconds ago. "Tucker is having a baby!?"

"No one is having a baby!" Wash assured the yellow clad teenager, sighing deeply, rubbing his forehead. "Sarge, both of those are utterly ridiculous. I'm sure it's nothing but a cold he picked up on his journey, nothing more, nothing less."

"Yeah, well- then you can get me a bucket!" Tucker ordered, much more irritable and snappy in his sick or pregnant state. "And make it fast, I feel like shit!"

Wash looked ready to protest, so it was just his luck that Tucker immediately threw up his dinner from last night, an awful smell filling the base quickly. "Oh for the love of-"

"-I'll get the mop…" Caboose said with both distaste and disappointment, dragging his feet sadly as he made to get said mop.

* * *

><p>"WASH!" Tucker screeched, now sat up comfortably in bed, surrounded by pillows and a few pictures Sister and Caboose had drawn for him. "I need you!"<p>

"Coming!" Washington replied, running through the base, a bucket at the ready.

"Why aren't you in uniform?" Tucker asked, voice getting soft and small as he pushed the blanket up over his mouth, eyes at the ready.

Wash rolled his eyes, shaking his head. "I'm not wearing that damn outfit, Lavernius Tucker." He stated, pouting childishly. "It's completely unnecessary."

Tucker's eyes got a little glassy looking, he sniffled even, making Wash feel like the biggest asshole in the universe. "But Wash… it'll make me feel so much better so much faster…"

"Did your ex really do this for you when you got sick back in your old village?" Wash asked, crossing his arms, beginning to give in.

"Yeah! It was a tradition… I miss her so much, Wash. Please oh please…. you've just gotta do this for me…" Tucker half-begged, trying to sound helpless.

Wash full on groaned, but nonetheless, ran off to get his 'Uniform'. Upon his departure, Sister and Grif entered the room, nodding at Tucker. "Sup, Tuck!" Sister greeted warmly.

"Sup, guys," Tucker replied, sitting up at once, abandoning the 'Woe is me' act in a heartbeat. "How ya doing?"

"Alright I guess," Grif answered, shrugging nonchalantly. "Donut keeps making us run 'Disease Awareness' drills. Me and Sister split when he started mentioning 'Together Showers'."

Tucker outwardly shivered. "Sick!" He exclaimed, sticking his mouth out, groaning as an ache ran it's way through his nervous system. "Fuck…"

"Flu still killing ya?" Sister inquired. Upon earning a nod, she smirked, running her hands over Tucker's stomach. "Here, this outta make it better…"

"Ow!" Tucker complained, wrenching away when Sister pressed too hard. "Careful, man! I feel and look like a Creeper ready to pop a boner!"

"Tucker?" Washington asked from the other room, light tapping coming from his direction. "What was it ya needed now?"

Tucker panicked. "Uh… Wash!?" He sounded histarical. "You might wanna… uh… just, fuck, I need another bucket!"

"That's all?" Wash asked, entering, holding said bucket securely in his white-gloved hand. "If that's all ya needed, I coulda gotten it without the… fuck…"

Grif, Sister, and Tucker all stared at Washington, who was dressed in a rather skimpy black and white maid's outfit, black heels and all. Honestly, the man looked nice in heels, but Grif and Sister randomly guessed it came from growing up with an older sister. The blonde blushed wildly, trying to pull the dress down more over his underwear, but it did little good to hide quite a bit to the searching eyes. After a moment, the Grif Siblings fell into a fit of shared laughter, their laughs not too much different, both amazingly cute and Cancer-Curing in their own ways. Washington blushed even more, looking away, face bright red with embarrassment. Tucker looked a bit guilty, but still chuckled a bit, secretly loving the sight.

"H-H-Holy SHIT!" Grif screeched out, rolling on the floor, unable to stay standing. "Aw Christ! This is the bed day ever, of all time!"

Sister was laughing just as hard, before she crawled onto her knees, getting in a praying position. "God," She managed, giggling before she speak again. "It's Kai… I know I said I was an atheist… I was wrong. So, so wrong." She crawled over to Wash, kissing his hand. "Thank you, Wash. Thank you so fucking much!"

Grif finally got up after a little while, helping Sister to feet, both stumbling to the door as they continued to giggle and laugh. As soon as they were gone, Wash death-glared at Tucker, who gave him a bobcat smile, completely amused and guilty. "You okay, Wash?"

"Besides my destroyed dignity? Yeah, I'm fine, Lavernius," Washington muttered, pouting as he crossed his arms, hating how constricting the dress was. "I hate you."

"Aw," Tucker cooed, smiling a bit softer at Wash. "You look nice. 'Sides, fuck those guys, not like embarrassing shit hasn't happened to them…"

"Like what?" Wash asked, suddenly very curious, sitting on the edge of Tucker's bed, placing the bucket on the floor beside the bed. "I'd love to know…"

Tucker grinned, relaxing in his bed. "Maybe I'll tell you a few things, I mean, we got the time…"

Before the two could get any closer (More like before Juju's Tuckington moment could happen), a loud scream carried from outside into the base.

"He was wearing what now!?" Sarge yelled, Simmons, Grif, and Sister laughing very loudly in the distance.

Wash blushed and ducked his head. "I… I'm just gonna… go get dressed. Ya know, before Grif and Sister have physical evidence."

Tucker nodded, if somewhat sadly, as Wash walked away. "Good idea, dude," He muttered, looking away as Wash disappeared around the corner. "Not like you looked sexy in that… ow, fuck, cramps!"

* * *

><p>"This is going nowhere!" Washington shouted, glaring at his boots and he crossed his arms, not looking the least bit pleased. "Tucker is sick, Caboose is trying but failing to help, Sister and Grif keep laughing when they look at me, Simmons is nowhere to be found, and Donut keeps trying to spray me with some kinda anti-sick thing or whatever."<p>

"'S not so bad, Wash," Sarge insisted, for once comforting the Ex-Creative Mode dweller. "I mean, least yer not dead!"

"Yeah, that's real reassuring." Wash muttered angrily, shaking his head in defeat. "I swear, I can't take anymore useless bullshit today!"

Suddenly, Sarge stood, glaring at something in the distance. "What in God's name- dammit, we got enemies inbound!" He readied his bow, breathing hard.

Wash stopped, turning around swiftly, only to be slammed into the ground by something way too heavy to be human. The man wriggled and squirmed until he was free and on his feet, sword in hand and ready to swing, before he stopped dead in his tracks, eyes growing wide as he looked his attacker up and down. "Maine?"

The Goliath nodded, picking Wash right up off the ground, giving him a rare bear-hug. The shorter, less strong man just froze, tempted to cry from joy at finally seeing at least one of his long lost friends. However, in seconds, North and York took Maine's place, if a bit less cuddly, just ruffling his hair and smirking like the knuckleheads they were. Carolina was next with Connie, Connie hugging around his waist tightly, Carolina kissing his forehead and whispering something along the lines of 'Missed ya, bro'. After awhile, even South stepped forward, simply smirking and giving him a playful punch to the shoulder, making the grey miner wince a bit, having forgotten South's great strength.

"What in Sam Hell is goin' on in this 'ere canyon!?" Sarge demanded to know, looking at the Freelancers wildly. "Who are these folks?"

"Sarge," Wash started, smiling warmly as he took a nice, deep breath, taking it all in. "These are my friends; these are the Freelancers."

Sarge stood there, eyes wide, their icy blue color shining a bit beneath the shadow of his blood red helmet.

"Oh."

* * *

><p>"So, these are the late asshole Freelancers?" Tucker asked twenty minutes later, sat up in his bed, eyebrow raised at the gathered miners. "I'm not impressed."<p>

"Tucker…" Washington made sure to add warning to his voice, knowing how short-tempered Carolina was. He supposed she got it from both of their parents.

All the Freelancers exchanged a few glances, unsure of what to say or how to interact with the newly introduced miners. North seemed less stressed out, having been taken aside along with South to draw and talk with Caboose, to which South had proceeded to draw obscenities and to North tisking at her like an old man. Connie was now on Maine's shoulders, a common place to find her these days, her hair style being stared at with impressed eyes by Donut. Maine stayed stoic and quiet, occasionally glancing at Grif, who he saw was staring way too longingly at his Enchanted Iron Sword. Simmons, Sarge, Carolina, York, and Wyoming all kept politely quiet, watching Wash and Tucker's interaction curiously.

"What? I'm just saying! They're fucking late as dicks, you were heartbroken without them around, dude!" Tucker explained, pouting and crossing his arms angrily. "If you should be getting pissed at anyone, it's them!"

"Tucker, I'm not pissed, I'm just concerned that you'll trigger Carolina into ripping your testicles off in one, foul swoop!" Washington stated, glaring at the aqua miner.

"It's true," Carolina promised, gaining everyone, even Caboose and the Dakota Twin's, attention. "What? If a guy pisses you off and he just leaves 'em hanging out there… girl's gotta do what a girl's gotta do."

"Word." South added, nodding proudly as she finished scribbling something in brown crayon, using it in an almost gentle fashion with her strokes before holding it up proudly. "Look; I drew a dick."

Caboose gazed at South's artwork, thoroughly impressed. "Oh my gosh, you drew a banana!" He explained, looking it up and down. "Can you teach me to draw fancy bananas?"

South grinned, patting Caboose's the head lovingly. "'Course I will, kid. I'll teach you to draw the biggest, hairiest, most beautiful bananas ever!"

"South," It was North's turn to warn South, giving her an unimpressed look. "Quit spoiling the minds of those who aren't you."

"Whatever, Mom!" South countered, chucking her crayon at North.

At once, Caboose grabbed South's still raised hand, holding it in a bruising grip that South could not escape no matter what she tried. "Do not throw things," Caboose ordered in a stern tone, sounding almost unreal. "We do not throw pretty color sticks at our friends. Understand?"

South gulped, wriggling nonstop. "Yes, sir." She mumbled in a weaker tone, one only North had heard her use as a child, on only a few, rare occasions.

That seemed to trigger Caboose back into his happy-go-lucky self, making him running his fingers comfortingly through South's hair. "Yay!" He cheered, smiling at her kindly. "Now we can continue to be super friends!"

Everyone else just stared, eyes wide. South regained as white as a sheet, taking a few minutes to just stare at her paper before returning to drawing, looking much less cocky now that she'd seen another side of Caboose. North reacted similarly, keeping his eyes on Caboose, but not enough to enact suspicion of any kind on himself from the blue dressed miner.

"I… I'm gonna pretend I never saw that…" York decided, earning a few nods. Even Maine looked scared for a few minutes, before looking gruff and fearless again.

"So…" Tucker trailed off, drumming his fingers on his bed, before his stomach started aching again. "Aw, fuck! Not again!"

"What's wrong?" A voice asked from outside, Doc having stayed outdoors out of nervousness of the Freelancers he'd befriended during his travels. "Um, I'm a medic, so… I could check you out and see what's wrong."

"You're a doctor?" Wash asked, looking intrigued. Anything that could get Tucker better faster was a Godsend in his mind. "Tucker here has been really sick lately… he can't even get up today…"

"Interesting," Doc commented, kicking into his Town Healer mode quickly. "Alright, so, I'll be needing everyone to leave the room if I'm to be checking our patient out…"

"You heard 'im! Everybody out!" Sarge ordered, firing an arrow into the roof for emphasis. "Quit stalling and get yer asses movin'!"

"I like this guy," Carolina commented as she passed, smirking at Sarge, to which Sarge simply glared back. Her aqua armor was a travesty upon his name as a Red.

It took longer for Wash to leave, his eyes still gazing at Tucker. "You sure about me going, Tucker?"

The darker man rolled his grey eyes, chuckling. "I'll be okay, Wash," He insisted, smirking at the older miner. "I'll scream if anything comes up, 'kay?"

"… 'Kay." Washington finally agreed, eyes lingering before he huffed out, leaving Doc to take care of his patient.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Oh yes, I think we ALL know where this is going! And if you don't, I'm a bit disappointed. But, if you haven't figured it out, here's a hint; there's gonna be another member to the Blue Team very soon! Also, the next update MIGHT be here next Friday, but now the fic is all caught up with my AO3 account, so... we'll see if I can do it or not!**

**~CabooseHeart.**


	8. Chapter 8

**Nether Worry**

**Part 8**

**Pairing: Agent Washington/Tucker, Caboose/Church, Grif/Simmons**

**Description: In which the Reds and Blues come across a lonely Creative Mode dweller, Sarge makes about ten times more Iron Golems than are strictly necessary, and where Tucker learns that Wash is indeed not a replacement for Church and that may or may not be a bad thing after all.**

* * *

><p>"What's taking them so long?" Washington asked, glaring at Blue Base with equal intensity as Sarge did everyday.<p>

"Calm down, man," York suggested, patting the younger miner on the back comfortingly. "I'm sure your boyfriend'll be just fine."

"He's not my-" Wash stopped, closing his mouth at the look York gave him, one he was far too familiar with now adays.

"Dude, quit lying. I saw the way you two were looking at each other, it was the same way I stared at 'Lina before we started dating," York explained, smiling at the memory. "Just tell him before some weird shit happens to him."

"Yeah, 'cus if ya don't, he's as good as dead around here," South stated matter-of-factly. "Fuck him while you can, Wash."

"You're not helping." Wash made sure to inform them, crossing his arms stubbornly. "It's alot harder than you think. I mean, Tucker's into girls, I can't just go in there and drop the bomb that I'm into him!"

"Yes you can," Carolina confirmed, shrugging at her younger brother's worry. She'd dealt with it for years after all. "Just go in there, tell him you're into him, then wait for a reaction. The worst he can do is say no, Wash."

"Or kick you out," South added, looking up from where she was seated on Caboose's shoulders. "He could throw you into the harsh, awful world and let you fend for yourself."

North walked past Caboose, smacking South on the knee, making her scoff and growl under her breath. "Ignore her," He suggested, smirking at his young friend. "Want my advice? Take it slow and wait for this whole thing of him being sick to blow over. Wait for your moment, then strike."

Wyoming gave North a careful look. "You sound like you're suggesting a way to murder him, lad," He made sure to inform the other, giving Wash a kinder look. "Just kiss him, for the love of God! What is with you kids and your ridiculous love triangles anyhow!?"

"Says the guy who I caught kissing Flo-" Connie was cut off as Wyoming smacked a hand over her mouth, muffling her until she licked his hand, making him squeak and let go. "My advice? Go with the flow, Wash."

Wash sighed, shaking his head. "Thanks, I guess, but I think I'm more confused now than I was before this conversation." He admitted, looking away.

As the seconds crept by for Doc's return, a sudden arrow shot through the air, smashing down beside Carolina's foot, making her jump. The red head swung around at once, sword at the ready, before she stopped, eyes wide as she gazed at the blonde before her. Tex stood tall and angry before the Freelancers and Blood Gulch Crew, a Zombie with mist surrounding it to her left, and a Creeper to her right. She glared at the two groups, looking them over before her eyes landed on Kaikaina, who was staring shamelessly at her breasts. The older woman gave Sister an odd look, looking the brunet up and down.

"Hey, kid," Tex said, snapping her fingers to catch Sister's attention. "Quit staring at my chest."

"You're kinda hot," Sister stated, as if this were a very important fact. "You from some kinda desert biome, lady?"

"It's Tex," Tex explained, suddenly glaring full force at Carolina. "Who the fuck are you?"

"Who the fuck are you?" Carolina countered, crossing her arms as she gave Tex a once over with her emerald eyes.

"I asked you first." Tex insisted angrily.

"I asked you second." Carolina stated, smirking at the natural blonde.

Beside her, the Zombie scoffed, sounding flabbergasted. "Aw... She is Beth Allison AKA Tex; world famous sword-wielder, natural blonde, Blood Gulch Queen, part-time miner."

"... Oh..." Carolina simply replied, not looking too impressed by the looks of it.

"Now... who, the fuck, are you?" Tex asked, voice teetering on dangerous and blood-thirsty.

"My name's Carolina. I'm new to Blood Gulch." Carolina provided, smirking again at the blonde. "So... you're the girl Caboose keeps going on about... 'bout time I finally met you."

"You only heard about her, like, seven minutes ago," York spoke up, but shut up when he saw the way Carolina and Tex were glaring at each other. That glare only meant one thing for Carolina, and judging by the way that Zombie was starting to freak out... aw fuck.

"Hey, guys, I- what's going on?" Doc stopped short, staring from Carolina to Tex, a first-aid in his hands. "Uh... whose she?"

"We'll get to that later. How's Tucker?" Washington stepped in, brows knitting with worry as he walked over to Doc.

"What's wrong with Tucker?" The skeleton asked, stepping forward, so that a tiny white mini-version of church could pop up before the miners. "He dead?"

"Church!" Caboose screeched, throwing South haphazardly off his shoulders, letting her collapse on Connie as he talk-hugged the Zombie. "I have missed you so much! Did you miss me?"

Faintly, Wash could just make out Church whispering something to Caboose, before he straightened, his momentary anger diluted for the time being. "Seriously, where the fuck is Tucker?"

Doc sighed, rubbing sweat from his forehead. "Inside, but you can't see him right now. Actually, that's what I'm here to explain. You see, your friend is-"

"Dying? Oh no!" Caboose screeched, letting go of Church to grab Doc by the shoulders, sobbing violently.

"No, he's not dying, he just has-" Doc, once again, was cut off.

"No chance to live? I knew it!" Caboose exclaimed, now on his knees. Off to the side, Connie had a bowl of popcorn, eating excitedly as she watched the scene unfold.

"Caboose! One more interruption outta you, and he's gonna have two patients." Church promised, raising his fists carefully, though it was clearly an inexperienced action for him in his new body.

"How do I say this, your friend is..." Doc stopped, making everyone just stare him through several beats of silence.

"Why are you pausing? Caboose is not gonna interrupt you this time." Carolina explained, seeing as if Church didn't shut him up, she would. She was just as curious as the others to see what was wrong.

Doc rolled his eyes, showing a bit of hidden sass underneath his usual layer of fear and shyness. "No, that was just for dramatic effect. He's pregnant." He confirmed, looking proud.

"Wait, what the fuck?" York asked, giving Washington a long stare. "Dude, I thought you were gay! And I thought Tucker was man!"

"Heheh, fucking preggers." South muttered under her breath, smirking before she paused, looking very excited. "Holy shit, that means he's having a kid! Fuck yeah!"

"Doc, you've gotta be fucking lying. Tucker can't get pregnant." Wash explained, looking absolutely horrified with Doc's conclusion.

"Yeah, well, maybe SOME old chap should've used protection, hm?" Wyoming stated, with everyone giving Wash a round of disappointed stares.

Wash sputtered, looking from the Freelancers to the Blood Gulch Crew. "For the last time, I am not in a relationship with Tucker! Secondly, even if I were, I'm asexual!"

Caboose tilted his head, utterly confused. "Washingtub, what is asexual supposed to mean?"

"Oh, well, it means I can still love someone, but I just don't want to have sex while in our relationship." Wash explained.

"Oh... what does sex mean?" Caboose decided to ask next, after all, if Wash had used the word, surely HE would know what it meant, right?

"Uh..." Wash trailed off, suddenly wearing a way too enthusiastic grin for the Blue rookie. "Well, I'm no expert obviously, but the Reds would just LOVE to tell you all about it, Caboose!"

Caboose gasped, eyes wide. "Really?"

Wash nodded, internally noting to thank the Reds later on. "Yep! Why don't you go on over to Red Base with them and learn about it while I take care of Tucker?"

"That sounds very fun..." Caboose announced, mulling it over. "I think I will do that."

"Perfect." Wash replied, maneuvering Caboose to go with a rather pissed off looking Red Team. "Have fun, buddy!"

"You owe us big time, Washington." Simmons promised, honest to God glaring at Wash before walking off with his team, Caboose in tow.

Wash turned back to Doc, glare sharp on his face. "Alright... now let me see Lavernius."

* * *

><p>The inside of Blue Base was warm and inviting, yet the thick stink of sickness ricocheted through the air, making anyone who entered gag or step back. Wash bit his tongue, walking behind the medical officer to soon stand beside Tucker's bed, where the darker man was found soundly sleeping. His skin was flaming hot to the touch, and his face was soaked with a thick layer of sweat. The sick miner groaned in his sleep, unable to turn over on his belly, a small but very round and noticeable bump now showing. Wash hesitated, but then rested one of his hands on the round mound, sighing as he stared at Tucker.<p>

"I gave him some meds to keep him under," Doc informed the Freelancer, a considerable distance behind him. "He'll be out for at least an hour or so, but he might deliver any day now."  
>"How could he've gotten pregnant? Not that I'm saying he is, but... is it possible?" Wash asked, squinting down at the younger man's stomach. "I've never heard of a male pregnancy before."<p>

"Zombies do it to Villagers sometimes, but usually only females," Doc explained, already setting a bucket of water to boil on a nearby stove. "I'm not saying it's common, but I believe it's possible. Can you ask Sister if her and Tucker got attacked by any Zombies on their quest?"

"Uh, yeah, I can do that." Wash replied, nodding to himself as he grabbed a small, Red Stone powered machine. Sarge had invented a few days ago. "This is what Sarge calls a 'Walky Talky'. If something happens... press the red button. It'll connect you to Red Base."

"Got it. Don't you worry about a thing, Wash. Tucker is in good hands... okay, not good hands, but reliable ones!" Doc promised, waving at Wash as the Freelancer ran off.

Alone again, Doc got to work. He checked on the water again before searching a nearby chest, finding wool blankets and a few sponges inside. He grabbed a bucket of colder water, and threw the sponges in to let them soak. The medic quickly washed his hands in the sink afterwards, running some over his face. He was exhausted, and part of him was reminding him that he'd never performed a successful birth before... but hey, seventeenth time's the charm, right? Yeah, he'd do just fine. It's not like Washington and the others would kill him in a fit of rage of Tucker died, right? Oh God, go to your happy place, Frank! Go to your happy place!

"You're a real lucky guy, Tucker," Doc announced, deciding to just talk aloud to his unconscious patient. It was better than thinking about his possible death by nightfall. "Having a boyfriend like Wash must be so comforting, knowing he's there for you. At least, I believe you're both dating. You're just hiding it, I'm sure."

Tucker didn't reply, unless his pain filled moan was any acknowledgement towards the medical officer. "I know it hurts, buddy. Just lie still. The baby'll be here soon." Doc assured his patient, patting his head comfortingly.

After a few minutes of this, the Walk Talky went off, flashing bright red. Doc clicked the red button, blinking down at the device. "Um... hello?" He asked, voice a bit worried. He'd never seen technology this advanced before. "Is anyone there?"

There was heavy static before a voice broke through, hard to hear yet easy to interpret upon further listening. "Doc, this is York! Wash asked me to call you on this thing! By the way, this thing is fucking awesome!"

"Heya, York." Doc greeted, trying not to sound too nervous. "Any news from Washington and Sister about my theory?"

"Yeah, Wash said that Sister said that they didn't meet any Zombies. Sister also told me to tell you that she thinks Crunchbite did it, whoever that is. Sounds like a professional Endermen hunter." York explained, the sound of others talking in the background making it hard to hear him. "Hey, guys, quiet the fuck down, I can't hear shit from Doc!"

"Then why don't you clean out the bird shit from your ears!?" South suggested, a loud 'Ow' being heard afterwards, possible from someone smacking South in the head.

"Sorry 'bout that," York apologized, chuckling a bit under his breath. "Everything's kinda hectic at Red Base... that Sarge guy keeps yelling about 'Hermaphrodite Blues' or some shit."

"Alrighty then... Crunchbite... I think I heard Sister mentioning him earlier, when I was working on Tucker in the Base. Didn't she say he was an Endermen or something?" Doc asked, trying to keep the stories straight in his mind.

"Uh... let me check..." York pulled away from the Walky Talky on his end, screaming loudly in the background. "Yo, Sister, Doc wants to talk to ya!"

In a matter of seconds, Doc's ears were flooded by Sister's loud and bodacious voice. "Oh, hey Doctor guy! So, you wanna talk or something? I got tons I can talk about!"

Doc coughed weakly into his hand, blushing rose red. "Um, actually, I wanted to know a little more about your friend Crunchbite."

And just like that, Sister went quiet, a rare occurrence in everyday Red vs Blue life. "Oh... yeah, him. Well, he was my friend who saved me once, and we stuck together for a long time... he left awhile back."

"I'm sorry to hear that," Doc replied in his best 'Doctor-Explaining-A-Loved-Ones-Death' voice, trying to keep his tone level and neutral. "Can you tell me his species and appearance?"

"Yeah! He was an Endermen, and he was, like, mega fucking tall! Also, he had a blue bow on for, like, two seconds one time when I put it on him. He burned it. It was hot. Like, the fire was hot, not Crunch, that's kinda fucking weird." Sister explained, her tone getting lighter and happier again.

Doc nodded to himself, scribbling it all down in an empty book with an ink stained quill. "I see. Was there anything else that was abnormal about him? Personality wise or physical wise?"

That got Sister to pause again, not from sadness or repressed feelings, but from honest to God confusion. "He was kinda... quiet. I dunno, lots of Endermen kinda are, but he was, like, super duper quiet. Like, he always looked like he wanted something, something really big that he couldn't tell me. I think it was that block thing, but I dunno, man."

"Got it. Thanks for the help, Sister." Doc replied, waiting until Sister had wished her goodbye to hang up. "Well, now I'm even more stumped. Guess we're clueless until the baby comes..."

"Hrgh!" Tucker cried out, snapping awake in a cold sweat as he writhed on the bed, looking shocked and suffering. "Holy shit! Ow, ow, ow! Why does it hurt!?"

"Oh boy..." Doc muttered, snapping on some clean leather gloves. "Better get the water and call Wash... this'll be interesting."

* * *

><p>"I want to see Tucker!" Caboose boomed, the only reason that he was not in Blue Base being that the entirety of Red Team was dog-piling on him. "He is crying!"<p>

"Caboose!" Simmons's voice was high pitched, mainly from fear, as he struggled to stay on top of the giant Blue miner. "Please calm down! Tucker is gonna be.. OW, fine! Grif, get the fuck off!"

"You get off!" Grif yelled, somehow having a much better grip on the miner than anyone else on his team.

"Both 'a ya shut it!" Sarge ordered, kicking outwards in a random fury. Donut squeaked, almost slipping off as Sarge's foot connected with his thigh. "Oops. Sorry there, Donut. Pass that on off to Grif, will ya?"

"Yes sir!" Donut replied, very lightly patting Grif's head rather than kicking the larger miner. "I think that'll do!"

Sarge outwardly groaned. "Dammit, Donut! When I say kick I mean for you to clobber Grif into the goddamn ground! Not tap 'im!"

Donut nodded quickly, giving a slightly harder tap to Grif's cheek this time, earning a neutral 'Meh' from the receiver. "That good, sir?"

Sarge had lost his faith in the wonder child that was Donut by the time North stepped outside, he and Washington being the only ones besides Doc inside Blue Base during the birth. "I've got news." The twin announced, earning everyone's attention. "The baby'll be here any minute!"

"Great!" York chirped, then stopped, suddenly awestruck. "Um... what're we gonna do when it fucking comes out? I mean, we're not exactly baby experts."

"We'll go with it," Carolina promised, standing before North as the leader of the Freelancers. "How's Tucker?"

"He's... well, he's getting through it. I've never heard a grown man scream that loudly before." North admitted, scratching the back of his head.

"Really? Woulda thought York would scream louder while you were sucking his hairy cock!" South stated, looking all too proud of herself for the insult. She blinked, surprised by everyone's glaring. "What? Just trying to lighten up the mood since that Tucker guy is gonna drop dead."

Before anyone, namely North, correct South or argue with her, a loud, thunderous cry arose from the base. "Holy shit! Oh my God... OH MY GOD! THAT IS NOT A HUMAN! THAT IS NOT A HUMAN FETUS!" Wash came screeching out of the base, terror written on his face. "THAT IS NOT A CHILD! THAT IS AN END SPAWN!"

Everyone stared, perturbed yet interested. "So... whose gonna go in first?" Church asked, looking around at his teammates and acquaintances. "Oh come on, someones gotta go check on those assholes!"

"He's right!" Sarge bellowed, standing up at once, a heroic pose in place. "As the leader of Red Team, it is my soul duty to protect my squad, even Grif... CHARGE!" He bounded into Blue Base.

Not two minutes passed before Sarge came screaming out, face white as a sheet as he ran off for cover. "ON SECOND THOUGHT, THERE IS NO SHAME IN RETREATING!" He claimed, escaping into Red Base with shocking speed.

Caboose then stood, Simmons, Grif, Donut, and Lopez tumbling to the ground beside him as the Blue miner stared at his own base. "I will go meet the scary baby... and we will be friends." He walked right in, despite everyone's protests.

A few minutes later (He lasted longer than Sarge or Wash), a loud, terrified screaming filled the air. "That tears it!" South announced, readying her Iron Sword. "You can terrify Wash! You can chase of the Sarge guy! You can even be an abomination! But NO ONE messes with Caboose!" She took off inside, finally followed by everyone else.

What was inside was beyond imagination.

* * *

><p>"Oh my God!" Surely Church.<p>

"It's HIDEOUS!" Definitely Tex.

"Hoppy shit!" That was York.

"!" Ah, yes, Maine.

There were many other reactions, but all of them were very similar. The Freelancers watched curiously as Doc held the small, squirming bundle in his arms. The little humanoid had pitch black skin, darker than even Tucker's skin. His eyes were a violent shade of pink, burrowing into anyone who stared too long, creeping into their unsuspecting souls. His hair matched his skin, yet was a shade darker, and the inside of his mouth looked like a black-hole. The infant cried out as Doc held him, kicking and crying for Tucker, who was barely conscious.

"It's a... boy?" Doc managed, loyally handing the small monstrosity to Tucker, who held the baby securely in his half-dead grip. "Congratulations!"

"Yeah, congratulations on your bastard child, Tucker." Tex muttered, patting the short man's head almost fondly. "You two'll be real happy together!"

"I... can I just die? Like, seriously, can I just die? Right here?" Tucker begged, the baby grabbing at his lip, pulling angrily. "The fuck you want, buddy?" He asked, though he sounded oddly... happy? It was hard to tell. "You hungry or some shit?"

"Okay, yeah, no, I'm not watching you feed that thing!" Church decided, turning to walk away. "Fuck this, fuck that monster, and fuck me!"

"I would, but you literally have no cock." Tex promised, earning a loud, steady silence. "Hey, I'm just being honest."

"That is not a baby." York whispered, barely loud enough for Carolina to hear over everyone's continued chattering.

"What do you mean? It looks like a baby to me." Carolina announced, hands on her hips as she nodded at the tiny child.

"The fuck?" North rarely swore, but for once, he let himself. "How can you believe that... that Mob is a human baby?"

"Babies don't gotta be human," South told her twin, taking the baby from Tucker's grip, looking it over carefully. "... Yeah, this is a legit baby."

"So... what now?" Connie asked, and the room grew painfully quiet, the only sounds being the baby's continued cries and Tucker's pained moans.

What now indeed.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: This took literally centuries, but here we are! JUNIOR! Please R&R!**

**~CabooseHeart.**


	9. Chapter 9

**Nether Worry**

**Part 9**

**Pairing: Agent Washington/Tucker, Caboose/Church, Grif/Simmons, Connecticut/South Dakota, New York/Carolina**

**Description: In which the Reds and Blues come across a lonely Creative Mode dweller, Sarge makes about ten times more Iron Golems than are strictly necessary, and where Tucker learns that Wash is indeed not a replacement for Church and that may or may not be a bad thing after all.**

**A/N: So I can't remember if I set this story in any specific month, but I'm just gonna roll with the idea that it's late November there too.**

* * *

><p>"Okay, Junior! Repeat after me!" Doc ordered, smiling at the baby Endermen-Human hybrid.<p>

Blue Base was rather quiet that morning, it being three days since _'End's Offspring'_ had been born. Currently, Doc had taken a liking to teaching Junior new words and phrases, but nothing worked that well unless Tucker was around. Said miner had been sleeping more, claiming that the birthing process had taken a huge toll on him, which wasn't completely untrue. Still, everyone was starting to grow tired of Tucker's laziness, all except Caboose of course, who'd been too busy hanging out with Church (Which meant following him literally everywhere he went).

Red Base was rather loud, the noise never ceasing to completely dissolve. Amazingly enough, Grif was struggling to sleep, claiming that Junior was making him nervous as fuck. Simmons was unaffected by Junior, but sympathized with Grif, spending even more time with the orange miner. Sarge busied himself in building, attempting on behalf of Church to create some kind of potion that'd restore him to his human form. Meanwhile, he was also trying to make an eternal life potion for the Freelancers. Donut had taken a liking to hanging out with Connie, for some reason, but no one complained. But somethings never changed, like how Lopez stayed loyal to Sarge, growling at anyone who came near either of them that wasn't a Red (or Grif).

The Freelancers had started up on making their own base, building it with mostly grey and black colors. Maine seemed neutral as usual, Connie was excited to explore and talk to anyone who'd listen, York seemed happy as a clam to chat for hours with Tucker, Carolina and Tex liked to wrestle and argue on a daily basis, North liked spending time hanging out with Caboose, South seemed eager to play with Junior, and Wyoming tried as hard as physically possible to avoid everyone. Things had been cooling down, and everyone was glad for it.

As for Washington… he was still worrying over everything, but even he couldn't deny the air of peace that'd settled over Blood Gulch. So, he had decided to keep staying in Blue Base, currently watching Doc make a fool out of himself… _again_.

"You ready to be amazed, Wash?" Doc asked, looking all too hopeful as he grinned at Wash, while Junior sat before him in a highchair made by Sarge.

"If you think this'll actually work, sure." Wash muttered, giving the little infant an interested stare.

"Alrighty, Junior! Say purple! _Pur_… ple!" Doc sounded out, looking excitedly at his miniature student.

"_Screeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee_!" Junior sounded out, the noise loud, torturous, and downright offensive.

However, Doc seemed to find it acceptable, patting Junior on the head. "Good job, Junior! Once I've taught you all the colors, I'll teach you how to not judge people by them!"

Washington rolled his eyes, standing up to leave. Tucker wouldn't be up for at least another hour, and boredom clawed at his brain like an out of control grizzly bear loose in a petting zoo. "Hey, I'm gonna go check on 'Lina and the others, 'kay Doc?" He called out, standing up to leave. "Call me if Tucker wakes up."

"Got it, Wash!" Doc replied, looking up from where he'd been playing with Junior, who he quickly turned to with hopeful eyes. "You finally gonna say that thing to Wash, Junior?"

"Scr- _MPH_- Blar-" Whatever Junior had been trying to say to Washington over the last few days, it seemed like today was not the day for it to be said.

"Aw well. Bye, Wash! Can ya tell Connie I said hi?" Doc asked, picking Junior up out of the highchair to set him on the recently carpeted floor.

"Sure thing. Bye, Junior!" Wash said, before waltzing out the door, the wind blowing right into his eyes.

* * *

><p>November had, at first, blown into Blood Gulch without so much as a chill, but after only a week or so, it was snowing and damn near impossible to go outside without freezing to near death. Thankfully, it wasn't December quite yet, meaning the snow wouldn't stick around after landing for a few more weeks. Washington tied the Creeper scarf around his neck tighter, feeling almost like a hangman as he stumbled over the rock-hard ground. It was terribly cold, yet it refused to snow, much to Connie and Maine's delight. Personally, Wash liked the snow, as long as it didn't stick around for way too long. It was peaceful, and he'd rarely seen it growing up in a Desert village as a child.<p>

Speaking of childhood, Wash could just make out his older sister from where he stood, her cherry red hair flowing like ocean waves in the harsh breeze, her aqua sweater looking nice and cozy around her short form. York was beside her, his arm wrapped around her thin waist as another harsh breeze blew by, making Wash and probably everyone else outside shiver. Carolina, York, and the other Freelancers were currently holed up on top of their in-progress new base. It didn't look half bad from where Wash had been standing, and would be at least three or more times bigger than Red Base or Blue Base.

"Hey, _Wash_, you okay over there?" North asked, poking his head out the front door of the base. He and Maine had been busy working on the bottom floor and basement rather than the upper levels, seeing as they both feared heights quite a bit. "Wanna come inside?"

Nodding, Wash happily took the offered invitation, hurrying inside of the base. Inside, it was made very clear to the blond man that things weren't even close to finished. There was still a gaping hole in the floor, for one thing, where Wash could see Maine inside setting up torches and cleaning away some of the excess dirt. North and Maine were both filthy, covered head to toe in dirt, grass blades, and still wet mud. Thankfully, they were both dressed in older and more worn out clothes they had found, making it not as annoying or at least less awful to get a little dirty. As long as their armor and everyday clothes were clean, they'd be just fine.

"How's the baby? Sorry, South's been bugging me every ten minutes to call you and ask about him." North admitted, scratching the back of his head as he blushed.

"Oh, Junior's fine. Doc's been keeping him entertained while Tucker rests." Washington explained, pulling off his scarf. It was beginning to itch and strain his breathing. "How's everyone here?"

"_Busy_." North deadpanned, making a sideways jerk with his head in the general direction of the ladder leading upstairs. "Everyone's been working on the base. You should consider joining us, it'll be funner with the whole gang around."

"I know, but I wanna stay with Tucker if I can. He needs me right now." Wash mumbled, it being his turn to blush as he looked away nervously. "I was just checking on you guys is all… _hey_, tell Connie that Doc and I say hi, 'kay?"

"Sure," North muttered, sounding almost hurt at the fact that Wash still wasn't interested in joining in on the building process. "Need me to pass anything on to 'Lina too? I don't mind."

"_Naw_, just tell her I said hello." Wash explained, reluctantly tying back on his scarf. "I'm gonna go back and recheck on Tucker. Visit me at Blue Base later if you want. _Oh_, and bring York! I've been meaning to hang out with you guys for awhile now."

"You got it, Wash." North replied, turning back to digging out the hole with Maine, though he stayed above ground. "Bye."

"Bye." Wash muttered, leaving the warmth of the unfinished base, only to plunge head first into the bitter cold of Blood Gulch's incoming winter.

* * *

><p>"How was your walk?" Doc asked as Wash entered, holding a half undressed Junior in one arm, Epsilon under the other.<p>

"Just fine. How was Junior?" Wash asked, looking concerned as he spotted the scratch marks on the baby's face and arms.

"Oh, yeah, he yanked on Epsilon's tail… _not_ pretty. I ran to get the first-aid kit, but when I came back, Epsilon was paralyzed on the ground while Junior stared at him… was _kinda_ weird. Think he's gonna grow up to be like _Medusa_? That would be _so_ cool!" Doc explained excitedly, allowing Wash to hold the injured baby. "You're just in time. Mind patching Junior up while I make sure Epsilon isn't… ya know, _dead_?"

"Yeah, sure, no problem, Doc." Wash mumbled, placing Junior on the carpeted floor as he pulled out white bandages from the first-aid kit, easily tying them over the tiny scratches. "You'll be alright, buddy. Just a few scratches."

Junior, still having not reacted to the cat's attacking of his person, stared at Wash, pink eyes bright and big with a certain, black-hole nature to them. Wash shivered. "You've got quite the death stare, Junior. That'll come in handy when you're older." Wash explained, grinning at the infant.

Junior simply blinked back at Washington, opening and closing his mouth repeatedly, as if trying to ask a very important question. "Come on, let's see if your dad wants to get up yet." Wash suggested, scooping Junior up and carrying him to Tucker's bedside, shaking the father awake. "Hey, _Tucker_, you ready to get up yet?"

"Fuck _off_…" Tucker mumbled sleepily into his pillows, not even looking at Wash or his baby. "I wanna _sleep_…"

"You've been asleep all day, Tucker. Come on, don't you wanna play with Junior?" Wash asked, smiling confidently at the man.

"'S not mine…" Tucker fibbed, rolling over, face smothered deeper into his little blanket cocoon. "I was never in that village, I swear."

"_Tucker_, I literally _watched_ you have this demon baby, so man up or shut up." Wash declared, gaining a bit of sass as he held the baby up to Tucker's face. "Just own up and respect the fact that you're a dad now."

"Fuck that, _just_… put it back where you found it, man." Tucker ordered, seemingly asleep again as snoring filled the air, but Wash knew better.

"Alrighty then, spread 'em." Wash in turn ordered, moving to the foot of the bed as he held Junior up to Tucker's feet. "Let's put 'm back in then."

"Wait, _what_!?" Tucker shot up, fully awake, and glared at Washington, grey eyes glistening with rage and annoyance. "Dude, that was a _bitch_ move."

"Oh good, you're awake." Wash simply replied, as if he hadn't just been about to shove a new born baby up Tucker's ass. "Junior's been crying for you on and off. Might wanna fix that."

"_Dick_. _Move_." Tucker muttered, but nonetheless took the baby from Washington's hold, holding Junior up to his face. "Heya, Junior. You hungry?"

"_Scree_!" Junior replied, clapping his hands, tiny speaks of purple glittery bits disappearing into the air whenever his palms connected.

"Alrighty then, breakfast it is." Tucker announced, heaving the infant onto his hip as he passed by Wash and into the kitchen. "What's with the bandages?"

"_Epsilon_." Wash deadpanned, joining Tucker in the makeshift kitchen to stand beside him, watching Junior with worried eyes. "Junior stared at him though and… Epsilon hasn't moved since. And I mean that, he's like a goddamn ice block."

"_Whatever_. If he was messing with Junior, he _probably_ deserved it." Tucker explained, pulling out a slab of steak from a chest. "God, is this even _healthy_ for babies? I mean, what the fuck do babies even _eat_?"

"Happiness." Wash suggested. Upon gaining silence, he huffed immaturely. "If _York_ makes a joke, everyone goes nuts, but if _I_ make one, no one even _chuckles_! I hate this canyon."

"Dude, I think it's been that way for _way_ longer than you've been in Blood Gulch." Tucker said, turning back to mashing up the boneless steak and slow-cooking it. "How're the Freedancers by the way?"

"It's Free_LANCERS_. And they're fine, _but_… I think they want me to live with them again." Wash admitted, staring at Tucker.

Tucker paused, turning to look at Wash. "But you're not, _right_?" He asked, then laughed outright. "That'd be fucking ridiculous."

Wash frowned, squinting his eyes at Tucker. "How is that ridiculous? I lived with them for years before I ended up in Blood Gulch. In fact, it seems reasonable."

"_Well_… it's just a dumb idea." Tucker announced, glaring at the food he was cooking. "You know what? Can you just… whatever, I don't care what you do! I don't care if you're helpful, or intelligent, or the nicest guy I've ever met! I don't _fucking_ care!"

It was dead quiet, Junior looking from one man to the other, pink eyes wide with surprise and curiosity. "… Do you want me to step out for a few minutes?" Wash asked, feeling uncomfortable.

Tucker sighed, nodding as he turned back to the steak. "Uh… yeah. I just… need some time, ya know? There's been alot of shit going on… I got a kid now, and, I _think_ I might be rethinking my life or some shit. It's weird."

"It's not weird, at least… I don't think it's weird, Tucker." Wash told him, walking out the door once again that day. "I'll be back soon… _later_."

"_Later_." Tucker repeated, Junior crawling onto his shoulders, despite being a newborn. Once Washington was gone, Tucker groaned, smacking his own head with the spatula in his hand. "… Should've said it, Vern. Should've _fucking_ said it."

* * *

><p>For about an hour, Washington laid on the grass outside Blue Base, staring with no intention of looking away at the sky. It was getting late, he knew that much, but a party was going to take place soon. Now that things had cooled down, York had insisted on throwing a <em>'We Found Our Once Misplaced Wash<em>' party, which would take place in the middle of a well-torched Blood Gulch. Said misplaced Wash sighed to himself, finding his life to be way too complicated, and considered narrating to himself to blow off some steam. He tisked it away though, not nearly focused enough to do it. Or was he _too_ focused? He had no clue.

It didn't take long for someone to notice him, not that Wash was overly concerned with being noticed, but nonetheless, someone did and they gingerly laid beside him. For a long time, far too long to be normal, Wash didn't look at them, until his curiosity won over and he rolled over. It was Texas, sky blue eyes matching the space of blue above their heads, her breaths coming out in soft puffs of white, natural smoke. She was like a dragon, words like magma on her tongue with too many ideas coming out at once, yet those words could turn to smoke and intoxicate you, wrap around you and-

Wash had no idea if those comparisons were appropriate, so he stopped thinking on them so heavily.

"It's cold out here." Tex mumbled, not looking at Wash, making him feel… _safe_. She wasn't pushing it, wasn't pushing for eye-contact like the others unknowingly did. Wash had no idea if it was for her benefit or his.

"It really is." Wash replied, because thanking her would be way too weird, far too awkward to say. "You gonna be okay?"

Tex nodded, and the corner of her mouth turned upward on her face, a strand of blonde hair almost blocking it. "I'll be fine… me, Church, and the Reds got a surprise for you. 'Lina pointed us in the right direction for a mine… we hit the goddamn _jackpot_, Wash."

Wash sat up then, eyebrow raised at the woman. "Oh really? I've never been a real mining-nut, if you don't mind me saying. York and Maine are super into that stuff though."

"Oh _no_, it's nothing _quite_ like that… you just wait and see, Wash. You and everyone else are gonna get one _Hell_ of a surprise at this party." Tex promised, jumping to her feet, turning to grin at her companion. "And thanks for letting me lay with you… haven't gotten the chance to in a long time."

"No problem. Thanks for sitting with me." Washington replied, standing up beside Tex. He was taller than her, almost a whole head taller. It made him uncomfortable for no particular reason.

"See you at your party, Wash." Tex yelled over her shoulder, already running off, before Wash could even say goodbye.

And, for a moment, Tex reminded Wash of a mother he hardly remembered… he had no idea why though. He supposed, also, that there were alot of things he didn't have a clue about. But maybe if he waited for awhile, and didn't force it… then things might go right after all.

_Yeah_. He could give that a try.

* * *

><p>"Happy birthday, Washingtub!"<p>

"_Caboose_, it's not-"

"Shut the _fuck_ up, North! Caboose, you do as you _damn well_ please. It can be everyone's birthday if you want it to be! North, go fuck yourself with a used dildo."

"_South_!"

"I'm just _saying_…"

Washington smiled fondly as he walked through the party, it being held in the middle of the canyon in the dead of night, hundreds of torches keeping monsters at bay. Several times already, South and Carolina had almost killed Andy, who'd cussed them out in Creeper (Carolina didn't understand any of it. South did. It was _BAD_). However, the party still went amazingly, the twins having set it up, being birthday party masters, according to York. Wash was sat up on top of a snack table, watching from afar as Sarge demonstrated how to turn a Flint 'n Steel into a flamethrower.

After only a moment, Wash felt someone sit next to him, and he at first thought it to be Tex, also attempting to avoid big crowds. But upon actually looking, Wash did not find Texas, clad in heavy black armor, but instead found Tucker, dressed in messy old leather armor dyed an ugly teal color. Wash knew it was ugly… but he didn't think it was very often, not anymore, not after seeing it everyday for months and months. Tucker was watching as well, Wash being able to see that Tucker wasn't as focused on Sarge as he was Junior, who was sitting on South's shoulders for a piggyback ride.

"She might _seem_ like a bitch sometimes, but she's good with kids." Wash felt it was good to tell Tucker this, as to keep him from worrying too much. "You can trust her."

"It's not easy, dude." Tucker announced, sighing as he stared at his own goddamn kid. "I just… it's so _fucking weird_, having a kid. I mean, I used to not give two shits about having kids, but… now that I actually _have_ one… it's so fucking weird, Wash."

"I would assume so. You doing better now?" Wash asked, leaning closer to Tucker, the odd apple cider drink in his hand held just a bit tighter.

"Uh, yeah, I am actually. Sorry I got so dramatic earlier… still dealing with really odd shit, and I'm freaking out a little." Tucker admitted, looking ashamed in himself.

"You don't need to be upset at yourself, Tucker. I mean… we _all_ have shit days, ya know? And sometimes, we have shit _months_, but good things can come out of those." Wash explained, telling himself somewhere in his head that he was _not_ the man to explain this sort of thing. Carolina was better at talking, _not_ him.

"You're right about that." Tucker agreed, smiling at Junior as the Endermen-Human hybrid giggled when Sarge almost lit himself on fire, high-fiving South as the blonde woman laughed along with him.

Just as Wash was about to maybe, I dunno, finally get his _goddamn act together_ and ask Tucker out, Tex got on top of one of the tables, clapping her hands. "Hey, everyone, can I have your attention?" Once everyone was staring at her, Tex grinned and nodded at the miners. "Great. Alright, so me and the Reds came across something quite interesting while on our mining trip today, and we've got a big surprise for ya. Church?"

Church stepped forward, holding Sarge's Flint 'n Steel. "Thank you for that shitty ass introduction, Tex. Now then, I'm going to explain the science behind this shit… because science is kickass. So then, to begin, this block-"

"This isn't the science fair, _dumbass_! Just tell us about the _goddamn block_!" Carolina ordered, glaring at the Zombie, unimpressed by his performance.

Church, in turn, stuttered uncontrollably, before flailing his arms in the air and falling to the ground, looking like a misplaced rag-doll.

"… _Wow_." Connie deadpanned, tisking at Church's limp body. "Are you _seriously_ throwing a tantrum right now?"

"… _No_." Church mumbled, appearing as a ghost above the Zombie. "Just, kinda freaked out internally. Running this thing ain't easy, ya know. Me and Tex had to hunt down my dead Zombie ass for three days straight… _not_ fun."

"So are you gonna explain what the fuck you found or _not_!?" South yelled, Junior yelling with her on her shoulders. "Just tell us already!"

"Fucking _fine_!" Tex screamed back, ripping off a blanket from on top of… a _Nether Portal_. "Here's what we _fucking_ found, happy assholes!? I'm gonna go make Iron Swords before we go…" Tex stomped off, looking like an angered tabby cat.

The group stared at the portal, all with very wide eyes. "Is… is it _safe_?" Carolina asked, not looking very sure of herself for once. "I mean, I've heard of the Nether, _but_… I don't know if it's safe to go in there."

"_Nether_ to worry, my dear!" York yelled, grinning at his girlfriend. "We'll just have to go and see!"

Everyone groaned at York's pun, making anyone who happened to come by Blood Gulch and see them think twice before entering the canyon.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Hope you guys like this, and I've got a SUPER special announcement for you all! (For my CabooseHeart people, I'm supercasey on tumblr)  
><strong>

**Starting now, and up until a month after the last chapter of Nether Worry, I am holding a contest to see who can make the best fanart for the fic, seeing as I know many people have been reading it thus far! So, here's the rules:**

**1. All entries must be submitted to Tumblr, and placed under the tag #rvb minecraft au**

**2. Anyone can enter, but must have a Tumblr account in order to fulfill rule number one.**

**3. Please message me on Tumblr or on a site I have this fic on when you post your art, though this is not required or you, it would be greatly appreciated.**

**4. All participants will have their art placed in the story on AO3 (Jujukind will be assisting me with it).**

**5. You can draw anything, as long as it's from the Minecraft AU and not yaoi. You can draw anything from an actual scene to a comic, or even just one of the characters in their armor.**

**6. At the end of the contest, I'll pick out my top five favorites, to which I will write them all RvB fanfiction.**

**7. Writing is also optional, though it will not be posted in Nether Worry on Ao3**

**8. That's about it. Have fun!**

**~CabooseHeart.  
><strong>


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